Chapter 4

*

"Jordan!" I had just walked out of my final lecture for the day when someone's arm swung over my shoulders. It was one of the guy's from the ski club, Xavier.

"What's up?" I fist-bumped his hand as we continued to make our way out of the building.

"We're all headed to The Eight later, they're having a sale on drinks and some new DJs gonna be there, it's gonna be lit. Can I ride with you?"

"Oh, I won't be going." I said.

"You won't be going?!" He asked shocked.

I chuckled. I understood his shock, amongst friends and acquaintances I was known as one to never stop partying or turn down a chance to drink. "Yeah. I... have a family thing, can't drop it. Sucks." I lied.

"Family thing?" Alexander had just joined us after stumbling away from some other people he had been speaking to, I would have laughed if I wasn't so distracted by my trying to come up with excuses.

"Did I forget to tell you? It's not important – extended family." I covered quickly. I just wasn't in the mood for a party right now. I wanted to go home, play some games and then go to sleep. Maybe it wasn't exciting anymore because of how much I had done it? Or maybe I was just tired out by all the recent assignments due and exams.

"Right." Alexander said unconvinced, Xavier had bought it though and I greeted him before he ran off towards the cafeteria to look for another person to ride with.

"Hey, you alright?" Alexander asked as soon as we were alone.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked confused.

"Uh, you haven't been to a party or brought a girl home in two weeks." He said.

"Oh that, I have assignments to finish." I was honestly just put off by even the idea of going. I just felt drained thinking about them and everyone I saw didn't attract me anymore. I kept seeing... Ha. Nothing. I kept seeing nothing.

Maybe this is what growing up is? Maturing? It could also be considered turning into Alexander... I grimaced. He was cool but he could be weird, and the way he looked at relationships was terrifying, as was his social life.

"Jordan?" Alexander shaking my shoulder snapped me out of my daze.

I sighed running my hand through my hair.

"Sorry, I just... I feel sick." It was true. I didn't like what was going on.

"Should I call your mom?" I laughed at how worried he looked.

"Alex, I'm twenty-one, we live on our own." I shook my head as we kept walking and he laughed with me.

We walked into the parking lot and I started talking about what we were getting for dinner to distract the both of us from talking – or thinking – about me.

"Can we go to Sergio?" He asked as we climbed into my car.

"Will Ben be there?" I asked looking into the rearview mirror as I backed out of the parking space. Alexander's crooked smile and silence was his answer, "No." I said flatly.

"Jordan come on, your mom won't let me drive because you told her I was a mess." He glared at me. "She even took my licence..."

"Because you were a mess," I said.

"I'll wash the dishes for a month." I paused and looked at him.

"Two months." I smiled.

"One –"

"We're not negotiating here, you asked me for a favour and I stated my terms. Take it or leave it, Alex. How badly do you wanna see him?" I asked. His glare at me deepened, "You know you can always walk, or call an Uber." I shrugged as I turned to go home.

"Fine." He hissed. I smirked.

"I'll wait outside," I stated heading around the black to go back towards the hospital.

"You'll be waiting for a long time." He said. I knew he wasn't lying. He took forever with Sergio.

We drove to the hospital before I accompanied Alexander to his boyfriend's room. I hesitated as I walked into the room and my eyes met Ben's for a second. He was with two other men and I assumed they were guarding Sergio. Because Ben and I were constantly around each other, our fighting had died down to arguing and we would occasionally have short conversations when discussing something one of our other friends brought up.

"Hi." His greetings were always plain and he made it sound like he didn't want to greet but was being forced to. I gave a nod in return before I greeted Sergio with a handshake. What can I say, he grew on me. Like a fungus. He was actually funny, mostly friendly and not as bossy and rude as I thought he would be. Shiloh got along with him more than I did though.

"Oh, hey guys. Hey, Jordan." I looked up and smiled at the nurse that held Sergio's meal.

"Hi, Sarah. How are you today?" I asked watching her place Sergio's tray down.

"Good, better now. Here you go." I grinned.

"I just make everything better, don't I?" I smirked watching her cheeks redden as she handed me some custard.

"Uh... that's mine." Sergio frowned.

"No, I brought two." She said smiling at me, "I figured you would be hungry after school."

"Alex went to school too." Clyde teased with a smirk. I chuckled.

"Thank you, Sarah. Nice hair."

"Oh, I just blew it." She beamed, "I have to go. See you later."

"See you, have fun." I smiled.

Sergio snorted once she was gone.

"Aren't you going after her?" Alexander asked.

"Yeah, she was practically begging you to." Sergio said.

"Kids." Ben muttered sounding annoyed, but I had come to assume that that was his normal tone of voice. Or maybe the sound of his voice just annoyed me?

"Don't worry. I'm sure someday someone will look beyond your saggy balls, age spots and general failure in life and find interest in you." I said.

"I'm getting discharged tomorrow!" Sergio sat up before Ben could reply to me. I gave the blonde man a grin that was only met with his narrow, fiery eyes before my phone buzzed and I averted my gaze down to the screen.

"Alex, dinner at Mom's. Come on."

"Babe, I have an exam tomorrow so I won't be coming by, but we can all have dinner at my house this weekend."

"Your house?" I raised my eyes at Alexander, but he wasn't looking at me.

He ignored me and began telling Clyde he should bring his daughter and ex wife and I shook my head as I got up and walked out.

I stopped in the hall to wait for Alexander but tensed slightly as Ben walked out; he didn't look at me though as he answered his phone and I felt my chest tighten as he smiled.

"Hey." He spoke.

I felt myself getting angrier as I watched him, but at the same time, I stared in fascination at the smile on his face that I had only really seen directed towards Sergio or Clyde. For some reason, I couldn't pull my gaze from him. Who was he speaking to that made him look so friendly and happy? I shook my head at myself. I don't care. Still, I didn't move my eyes from him until his conversation ended and he looked up making our eyes meet for a second before I averted my eyes to the hall behind him in an attempt to make it look like I had been trying to look past him.

Instead of doing what I expected – and was hoping – he would do and going back into Sergio's room, he walked up to me. I held my breath as I felt my heart pound. Probably adrenaline. My body was getting ready to fight him if he started anything.

I looked up confidently about to ask what he wanted but my thoughts just disappeared and I was left just staring into his eyes.

"Would you stop fucking staring at me?" He asked.

"I was trying to figure out how something like you could live this long." I said, "No one's ever tried to squash you? Used bug spray on you?" I asked faking curiosity. "Not pepper spray, Benjamin, bug spray. I know you've probably had a lot of pepper spray incidents."

Why is Alex taking so long? I shoved by Ben to get back into Sergio's room and frowned seeing Alexander and Clyde laughing with each other.

"You're so petty, little boy." Ben chuckled making me turn to face him.

"You know Dads usually stop hanging out with their children all the time when they can start taking care of themselves, right?" I knew he wasn't old enough to be Sergio's father but I also knew the question would annoy him anyway.

"You know people stop finger painting in kindergarten, right?" He asked. "Oh, Art is a profession. Can I buy one of your paintings, Jordan? This is probably more than it's worth, but I'll be generous." I looked down as the five he tossed at me landed on the floor. "Pick it up, it's practice for your street corner moments. Would you like my hat to keep it in?" He raised his hat. What is it? A fedora?

"I would sell you a painting but given your lack of skill, education and employment, you're going to need this in the near future." I used my foot to push the money back at him. "Try not to spend it too lavishly, Benjamin."

"Guys." Alexander sounded like he was trying not to whine.

I frowned as my phone rang again.

"Jordan speaking." I said to the number I had not recognised.

I froze as the person on the other end of the line gave a quick short introduction and Alexander raised his brows at me.

"Police station?" I asked making everyone's heads turn towards me. "You want to see me at the station?" The only thing I could think of that would require me going there would relate to Sergio, his gang and what happened to Alexander.

My heart was hammering in my chest already even though I knew I had nothing to do with any of what they had done. Alexander on the other hand...

"Yes, is there any chance you can make it here today? There's no trouble. We just have to ask you a few questions."

"Uh... Yeah, I-I can come by in an hour." I said.

"An hour?"

"Yes." I confirmed.

"Alright, see you then."

I pulled the phone from my ear slowly.

"You went to the police?" Ben was the first to speak.

"What would I go to the police for? If I ratted on you, Alex would be in shit too, Idiot." I said.

"Listen here, you fucking –"

"Stop." I looked at Sergio because of how authoritative he suddenly sounded, it just made you feel like you had to obey him, "Ben, go with Jordan. Jordan you tell them the truth – you knew basically nothing at the time, and Alex will go to dinner and tell your parents you're studying or something."

"Why must he come with me? If they see him, won't they arrest him?"

"No, they called you." Sergio said, "Just be calm, you haven't done anything wrong."

"But I know all of you have. How can I be fucking calm?!" I said.

I felt Ben grab my arm and pull me out of the room.

I felt sick. What if I messed up and somehow told them everything? Why was this my burden? Alexander's washing dishes for more than a couple of fucking months if I have to lie to the police for him.

"You just stay calm and answer their questions truthfully unless you know you shouldn't," Ben said while I drove towards the police station.

I was getting pissed. How had I been dragged into this shit? He kept speaking and I kept mostly ignoring him until we reached the station.

"What are you doing?" I asked as he followed out of my car.

"Just go with it, Jordan. I've been through this more than you have." He said.

"You're proud of that?" I asked seriously as I locked my car.

He didn't reply and we made our way to reception where I told her who we were meeting and she directed us to his office.

I knocked on the doorframe to get his attention as his door was already open. He looked to be in his mid-forties and was halfway bald already, his desk looked like a mess and he looked like he hadn't slept in a while.

He stood up greeting us before he stopped in front of me.

"What's this?" The cop motioned between us.

"Moral support. Right, Babe?" Ben asked taking my hand and intertwining our fingers. I looked down at our hands and he squeezed it for effect. I desperately wanted to pull my hand back.

"Y-yeah." I nodded.

"Alright. Come in." He motioned for us to enter.

Ben furrowed his brows and I shrugged to ask him why. He ignored me as he let my hand go so I could walk into the office.

Turns out they just wanted to ask me some things about the day my brother Ezra been shot, whether I saw the colour, types and registration numbers of the cars, any faces inside it. I told them the truth; I saw absolutely nothing except that it was black. That must be why he allowed Ben to stay, this wasn't about me or trouble I could be involved in.

When we finished I walked out of the building back into the setting sun and covered my face. My head hurt because of how stressed I had been coming here, but the worst part about this questioning had been picturing it all again, I could practically feel Ezra's warm blood on my hands. No matter what anyone said, I was the one who left him alone in that park.

"Jordan."

"What?" I hissed aggressively.

I felt Ben's hand on my shoulder, "Are you alright?" I shoved his hand away with a disbelieving scoff.

"You can find your own way home, right?" I didn't wait for his answer as I climbed into my car. I started it and once again left him on the sidewalk as I drove off.

*