5

Sarah's POV

I lock myself in my room, and lean against the wall, my cheeks start to burn, and my tears become uncontrollable.

I didn't want to react like that but it was stronger than me.

Three years have passed, and yet my father's death seems so recent to me.

The fact that my mother wanted another man in her life seemed so new to me, I knew sooner or later it was going to happen.

The problem is that it's still early, I didn't expect it.

I wipe my incessant tears with my forearm, the smell of this man runs through my nostrils, and immediately with a wild and rapid gesture, I take off his jacket and throw it across the room.

I head furiously to the bathroom, undress completely and turn on the cold water.

I rush into it, eyes closed and teeth clenched, letting the frozen water refresh my body, my mind....

I hurt all over, this day has been more than awful, and why don't these fucking tears stop?

Pathetic, that's what I am!

............

I get out of the shower shaking and cover myself with a towel.

My reflection is scary to see, a beautiful hematoma has settled on my cheek, my painful lips are swollen and my eyes...I prefer not to talk about it.

I head to my room, after putting on my underwear, I take out an old large white t-shirt that belonged to my father and put it on.

.........

Flashback 3 years ago

"Why did you come out without telling me?" he growls furiously.

I breathe loudly, and concentrate on the passing landscape.

"Sarah, I'm talking to you, you go out in the middle of the night and moreover dressed like this" he nods at my short black dress.

I try to control my anger and breathe slowly.

"I was with friends, moreover with Peter" I answered calmly.

He slams the steering wheel, making me jump violently.

"You say Peter?" he cries

It drives fast, a little too fast for my taste.

"Slow down dad please" I said feeling panic rise in me.

"You know very well that I can't stand this Peter, and I forbid you to see him again" he yells to scare me.

Tears begin to rise in me, not supporting that he writes to me.

"Daddy, slow down we risk having an accident" I shouted trembling

A car appears out of nowhere, heads straight for us.

"Dad BEWARE!!" I yelled

I wake up with a start, still this nightmare that often haunts me at night...the night my father left us.

I straighten up, sweating, and wipe away a few tears, my heart pounding against my rib cage.

I get up from my bed, and put myself on the balcony to find a normal breathing.

I take the opportunity to smoke a cigarette, then after calming down, I lie down on my bed in the fetal position, and hug my father's photo tightly to my chest.

"Dad..." I sobbed

This accident that he and I had that evening will haunt me all my life, I am the cause of this accident, if only I had listened to it, if only I had not gone to that damn party. .regrets are useless.

.........

The next day, I hardly wake up with a horrible headache from my restless and short night. I take a look at the time which displays 11:12.

Fortunately today I have class at 2 p.m., I get up from my bed when I crush something, this something is nothing but the jacket of "my mother's future fiancé".

I retrieve it and unconsciously I start to smell its scent, I mentally slap myself in front of my gesture and lay it on my bed.

This David is a handsome man who must be about my mom's age, I'm very grateful to him for saving me, but the fact that he chose my mom as his future wife sounds weird in my head.

Only yesterday he was a complete stranger, and soon he will be like a father, the thought frightens me.

I push all these thoughts out of my head and half-heartedly prepare for college.

I leave my house, closing the door tightly behind me.

I find that there are too many looks in my direction today, this bruise does not go unnoticed, I grumble internally.

"Mind what concerns you" I want to shout.

........

My day is going slowly, my lesson is over, I rush out, it's time for my shift at the restaurant but I won't go, I think I'll find another job because this place scares the hell out of me now.

Arrived at home, I see that my mother has returned because of the delicious smell of chicken.

"Sarah! Finally you came back, I really thought you were going to go back to this restaurant" she said from the kitchen.

"Don't worry, I won't go back, I'll look for another job" I whispered.

She stops cutting the tomatoes and stares at me worried.

"It's out of the question that you work, you have to concentrate on your studies my darling"

I join her in the kitchen and serve myself a hot soup.

"Mom, it doesn't matter if I work while studying and..."

"I said no Sarah, I'm too afraid that something will happen to you again"

I know she also thinks about my accident.

"I won't do anything for the moment" I reassured her

She immediately relaxes and sighs in relief.

"You know about yesterday, I..." she begins

"Mom I thought long and hard at night, the fact that you meet another man is completely normal, you are only 33, you have the right to start your life over, it's just that in shock I I reacted badly, I sincerely apologize for this childish behavior that I adopted yesterday" I said softly.

She looks at me relieved and takes me in her arms.

"Thank you Sarah" she whispers

She pulls away from me with a big smile.

"You help me make dinner" she said

"Go rest, I'll take care of it" I said, pushing her back to the living room.

She starts laughing and settles down on the sofa in front of the TV.

"And speaking of Sarah, tomorrow I'll invite David over for dinner," she writes to herself for me to hear.

I hardly swallow my saliva, the fact of having to meet this man often displeases me...