Chapter 2: Come Back to Us

I hear a car pulling up. The voices of Tori and Ronnie fill the air. I decide to sit in the treehouse and stare at the picture on the wall. It was the last family photo ever taken. It was the last moment we were all happy. The photos were taken last winter. We did a family photo session outside. I remember that day. I wasn't super excited to get dressed up. I wasn't excited to be cold.

"It's okay to be cold, Ollie. The winter won't last forever."

The memory of my dad's voice strikes my soul as my eyes turn red. I haven't cried about his death yet. I haven't even known or understood how to process his absence.

Sometimes I lie to myself that he went on the world's longest business trip, and he will return one day. I hear footsteps on the ladder as Tori, Ronnie, and Dale climb into Tori's half of the treehouse. They cross the squeaky bridge that connects our two worlds.

Tori and Ronnie both look at me. "Are you okay, Ollie?" Ronnie asks.

I can't even form words. Today sucked, and dad's dead. I shake my head no to signal to my sister I'm not fine. She sits next to me and hugs me with her familiar grasp.

Our eyes meet. I see the same eyes as my father on her. Those deep green eyes she is so lucky to have inherited. Yet, when I look in a mirror, all I see is my mother's face in masculine form. My eyes are dark brown. My hair is bushy and goes in all directions. Ronnie has dad's red hair, green eyes, and freckles.

"You look like him," I say.

A single tear comes to my face. I feel my eyes getting redder, my heart getting heavier, and my day almost ending.

"It's okay to cry about dad, Ollie," Ronnie says. Then, Ronnie turns to Tori and Dale.

"Can you guys come by later? I think he needs me now. Thanks for the ride home, Dale. Do you need gas money?" As she says this, I hand Dale $2.00.

"Thanks, man. See you all tomorrow," Dale says.

I shut the door to the treehouse. Ronnie invites me back to the couch.

I sit down by Ronnie and let the tears hit me. I don't cry long.

"What happened with you today, Ollie? Why did you snap like that?" Ronnie asks.

"Okay, for starters, I didn't snap. That asshole deserved what he got. Any punishment from punching him is worth it. He kept going on and on about how Tori won't be friends with me anymore because of her new boyfriend. And then he kept saying shit about him having sex with her. It was pissing me off," I reply.

Ronnie sees the anger in my face as I hear it in my voice.

"Well, thanks for standing up for her today. And yes, Jake Brady had it coming. Don't go doing it again. I guess it's nice to know. Tori is your pressure valve. I knew you were jealous this morning," Ronnie raises an eyebrow at me.

"I don't know, Ronnie. Maybe. There are you happy? You already told me to stay the hell away from your friends, and besides, she likes that Dale guy."

I look down. Why the hell are my sister and I having this conversation?

"We both know I would end you if you dated my friends. It's weird," she laughs.

"Yeah, I suppose it would be weird if you dated my friends. Like Lucas or Maximus," I tease.

Now I'm testing her to see if any of those names sound tempting.

"Your friends are either too high or too low for me," Ronnie comments.

I see the look in her eyes. She means it.

"Ronnie, you can be so shallow at times. I need to go to Mrs. Jenking's house to walk Ruby. And thanks for taking care of me," I say.

Time to go to my side business. As I get ready to head out the door, I hear knocking. It's Tori by herself.

"Hi, Tori. I'm heading out. I need to walk Ruthless Ruby," I say.

"Can I join you? I'm worried about you," she says.

"Sure, come with. But I must warn you Ruby is a big dog," I say.

We head out the door. Finally, the worst day of my life is almost over. Well, maybe the second-worst day of my life, next to my dad dying.

"I heard you fought Jake Brady and that you were expelled," Tori says.

She thinks I got expelled. So what the hell did Dale tell her?

"No, I didn't get expelled. I got excused from class. Brady was being a dick, and I finally beat him up. They want me to see a school shrink. They think I'm messed up. I haven't been myself since..." I can't finish that sentence.

"Since your dad died," she finishes for me. I nod.

"You haven't been yourself in a long time, Oliver. All you do is work, ignore everyone, and spend your time in that treehouse. Come back to us," Tori begs.

I hear her words, and I want to come back and be who I was. But I don't know-how. I can't be me anymore. I was alive when my dad was here. Have I become my mom? She mopes and mopes. Is that who I am now?

"You need to watch it, Ollie. You need to stop getting in fights. You have changed, and I don't know how to help you anymore. So why do you spend all your free time in the treehouse? I know you built it together, but you need closure. And shutting away everyone isn't the solution," Tori says.

She grabs my shoulder to turn me around. I see Tori trying to help me. I am past helping. There is nothing she or anyone can do for me.

"Let's get Ruby, " I say, changing the subject.

I ring the doorbell to Mrs. Jenking's house. She opens the door and out pops Ruthless Ruby. Ruby is a Bernese Mountain dog. She thinks she's a lap dog, but she's not.

"Remember to let her run around outside awhile, Oliver. Who's this young lady with you, your girlfriend? It's a nice day for a walk. Enjoy," Mrs. Jenking says.

"She's not my girlfriend. This is Tori. And we will enjoy the walk," I call back.

"Nice to meet you," Tori goes in for a handshake.

"Well, enjoy the weather, and when you get back, I will have some nice cookies made," Mrs. Jenking says.

Mrs. Jenking closes the door, and we start to walk with Ruby. I'm quite sure she walks me half the time. But I get $40 to walk her for an hour. So it's worth it, I would say.

"She seems nice," Tori says, breaking the silence.

"Well, yeah, she is. She always wants me to have a girlfriend. Sorry about that," I say, embarrassed.

I look at Tori and know she is being sincere. All my friends want me to snap out of this funk. But they don't know what it's like to lose a parent. A part of your memories fade, and your heart gets ripped out without warning.

I will never forget the school calling me down to the office to tell me the horrible news. When they told me I didn't cry, I collapsed and began shaking. Mr. Jenson, the principal, took me home.

My dad was on his way home from a business trip. He got so tired; he fell asleep at the wheel. He got so sleepy trying to take care of us. His sleep deprivation killed him. I remember I tried many times to stay awake for days on end, and then I tried driving until I fell asleep. I never had the guts to go through with it. I wanted to understand my dad and how awful his final moments on Earth were. His car flipped over twice, and he died at the scene.

"You're doing it again, Oliver. Stop going away into your thoughts. Let's walk, Ruby," Tori says, forcing me back into reality.

"Yeah, let's go," I agree.

I look at Tori, and somehow, she was able to lift me out of my hole. Not even Ronnie can do that for me.

"How is dating Dale going?" Why did I ask that?

"Going well. He is coming over for dinner tonight. He couldn't hang right now because he had to pick up his little sister from ballet."

I feel flustered hanging out with Tori. Was Ronnie right? Am I jealous? I don't know what it means to be jealous, to feel envious of other people. I am clueless about dating.

I know girls like me, but I haven't had a girlfriend. It's not entirely true. I did date a girl sort of last year named Crystal Hastings. She was nice, and we went on six dates. We never kissed and never held hands. I enjoyed laughing with her, but it was clear there was no chemistry.

Sometimes I wonder if there is any chemistry between Tori and me. There have been times in the past when I sensed an unspoken tension between us.

Too many people tell me she is off-limits, but why? Even before she was with Dale, she was off-limits. This forbidden fruit, I wasn't allowed to look at. It's stupid when I think about it. What right does Ronnie have to tell me not to date her friends? Or what gives Maximus the right to tell me I can't date his cousin? Rules are stupid, and so is high school.

"You know what I think, Oliver. I think we should visit your dad sometime. We can visit the cemetery, have a picnic, and recall our favorite memories of him. You need closure, and I think this might be a good way to do that. What do you think?" Tori asks.

"Yes, Tori, that would be fun. Thank you. A picnic at the grave?" I ask.

"Well, why not? Your dad always loved parties, so let's have one with him again. He's still a part of you, Ollie. Don't forget that. And I miss him too. He was my adoptive uncle after all," she smiles.

She looks at me the way she always does. I believe my sister was right about me this morning. I must have been jealous. For at this moment, I almost believed she was mine.

"Let's ask the gang and have a picnic this weekend. We can do chips and sandwiches," I say. I do need closure.

"Can Dale come?" Tori asks.

I don't reply. I don't know what to say.

"Look, I know you don't like him. And that's fine. But can he come?" Where did that come from?

"I like Dale. Who said I didn't like Dale? Sure, bring him along. Tell him to bring some pop," I reply.

I'm not mad about her bringing Dale. I'm just jealous it isn't me. Just because she has a boyfriend doesn't mean our friendship has ended. I need to remember that. I figure this whole idea is hers, and if she wants to bring him along, it's the least I can do. Besides, this whole picnic at the grave could be closure for me. I have denied his death, but I want to remember the way he lived.

I throw a stick. Ruthless Ruby runs it back and forth to me. Our hour with Ruby ends, and Mrs. Jenking has the cookies made as promised. She invites us in, and we stay for ten minutes.

"Come anytime. You are both so nice to Ruby," Mrs. Jenkins says.

She writes me a check for $40.

"Thank you, Mrs. Jenking. See you later," I say.

"Her cookies are amazing," Tori smiles.

"Here, take them. I get them all the time. She always makes sugar cookies. But it's the chocolate chip cookies she makes that I will never share. Those are legendary. What time is it?" I ask.

"You need a watch, Oliver. It's 5:00. I must go. Dale is coming over at 5:30," Tori replies.

"Don't forget to invite him to the cemetery. He needs to bring pop or lemonade," I remind her.

I didn't want the afternoon to end, and without thinking, I grab her by the shoulder and turn her around. I rest my forehead on hers and whisper, "Thank you." She blushes a little, and I know that tension between us isn't in my head. It becomes alive again.

"You're welcome. See you, Ollie."

After all the shit of today, it was worth walking Ruby with her. I now have the cemetery to look forward to. The thought of this makes me hopeful that healing from this dark hole might be possible.