4

I forced a smile at his remark. I was a stripper in the Bronx, of course I would have seen many dicks but his? Damn…I bit my lips as words got lost in my throat. I didn't expect him to strip naked in front of me and jerk himself on the couch. Was this what he meant by being alone?

“I am leaving, have a nice day.”

“Stay…stay with me.” I heard him say through his moans as his hand movement quickened on his crotch. “Fuck—fuvk! Lauren, damn…” He jerked quicker, his hands swiftly gripping his dick and stroking it harder.

I tightened up as he moaned my name, and I was forced to watch as his creampie gushed out of his cock, with him groaning.

“Oh shit, you were watching?” He laughed and stood up from the chair, standing behind me. I felt his hands wrap around my waist and he pulled me backwards, his crotch pressing on my ass.

“What are you doing?”

“Your diary, the black and white book. I saw what you wrote about me.”

“You went through my diary?”

“Yes and I want to help you achieve those fantasies of yours. Take it as an apology from me for ruining your family.” I stiffened at the sincere look on his face. Just one day I wished my life would just be back to normal and another second, Shane is back in my life begging me to stay. I felt my body betraying me as it flared up instantly. A part of me screamed to run, to put as much distance between us as possible, but another part—the part I didn't want to acknowledge—didn’t care at all.

Shane's breath was warm against my neck, and I could feel the hard press of his body against mine, his fingers curling around my waist possessively.

"Shane, you missed your chance three years ago. Do you know how hard it was for me to confess my feelings to you? And then you walked away, and now, you are my stepdad. You missed your chance, you missed it." I managed to whisper, my voice trembling. But even to my ears, the protest sounded weak, almost as if I were trying to convince myself.

"Then give me another chance, Lauren. I can rewrite the past again." His voice was a husky murmur, sliding over my skin. "You say you don't want me anymore but why does it feel so good?" He pressed closer, his lips brushing my ear lobe sending shivers down my spine. He continued, talking like nothing was wrong.

"Do you remember how you looked at me back then?" His hand moved from my waist, trailing a path up my side. "I saw it, you know. That curiosity, that fascination in your eyes every time I was around and your diary, it can't be that you have moved on so quickly.”

I was taken aback by his words, my face palling to my diary. I wrote a whole eighty pages of hot BDSM, kinky pleasure with my dad's best friend while I was in eleventh grade. I didn't think one day it would be in his hands and he'd know they were all written for him!

I laughed coldly that he had to remind me that I still liked him. And although I had moved on, seeing him today after many years, a very small part of me still wanted him.

"Mr. Shepherd..."My voice was still unsettled. How was I supposed to explain to him they were all fantasy. I have lived my life as a stripper and just when I quit to become normal, he shows up at my doorstep. "Things change, you know? People grow and leave the past behind and that is what I did. I left my crush for you in the past. You're now my stepfather. I need to go.” I pushed him slightly away from me but he was stronger enough, pinning me down to the wall.

He chuckled, raising my chin up to meet his face. "Lauren, do you know how I felt when you left the country? I felt devastated…. I felt disgusted that you left and I can't help but know it was all my fault." His hands moved to my shoulders, his eyes lingering on me, slowly boring into mine.

"I saw your love notes, your dirty fantasy of me in your diary. Everyday I read them reminding myself how stupid I was not to see the chance when you confessed to me. Tell me you don't feel this." He whispered, his thumb tracing the line of my jaw. "Tell me you don't want this as much as I do.”

I opened my mouth to deny it, but the words got tangled in my throat. His dark almond green eyes were fixed on me, drawing me in, daring me to cross a line I knew I shouldn't. His other hand slid down to my hip, pulling me closer until there was nothing between us apart from my body pressing against his skin. I could feel every inch of his cock on my ass.

My heart hammered against my ribcage, each beat taking my breaths away. "Say it, Lauren," Shane coaxed, his lips so close to mine I could almost taste his breath. "Tell me to walk away, and I will let you go.”

I closed my eyes, pleading internally for him to stop. Why didn't he understand that I was done already? I didn't like him anymore and I didn't want to cross boundaries while my mother was still alive. She wanted her husband to be by her side and not here, tempting his stepdaughter to fuck him. I bit my lips, my hands falling on his chest to push him away.

He smirked, gripping to my wrist and bringing my fingers into his warm mouth. I gasped as he sucked on my fingers. I weakly gulped in as Adam's apple moved up and down and pulled out my fingers from his mouth, each dripping with his saliva.

"That's what I thought," Shane murmured, his mouth capturing mine in a searing kiss. He pulled back just enough to look into my eyes, his gaze burning with desire. "You're not a little girl anymore, Lauren, and I don't want our chance to have a relationship to be ruined because I slept with your mother accidentally. It was my fault, my fault…”