05

« You’ll get used to it, » Nathan said.

We moved on to cheerier topics to lighten the mood, and that was certainly helped by the addition of wine. As expected, my veal was divine and it did make a nice change from the regular pasta meals I’d been eating. Nathan swore that when we went shopping tomorrow, he’d force me to buy different food to vary my diet.

« There’s nothing really wrong with pasta, though, is there ? » I said. It was supposed to be a rhetorical question but Nathan, as ever, had an answer for everything.

« It’s full of carbohydrates. You’ll get fat. »

With a twinkle in his eye, he fired a playful wink across the table at me and lifted his wine glass to his lips, tilting the smooth red liquid into his mouth.

« If that were truly the case, » I countered, « you’d see a lot more overweight Italians. You don’t, though, do you ? They’re a primarily slim nation and pasta is a staple part of their diet. »

« No need to get defensive, Bella. You know I’ll love you no matter what. »

I rolled my eyes and placed my knife and fork side by side to signal I’d finished eating. As per usual, Nathan’s hungry eyes burned into the remaining potatoes that I’d left. Having been together for so long now, I only had to nudge the plate an inch in his direction for him to take the hint and transfer the potatoes from my dish to his own.

« Have you been eating pasta every night, then ? » he asked me once he’d polished off my leftovers. Clearly he wasn’t too worried about his carbohydrate intake…

« No… Not every night, » I said. « I mean, Jasmine and I have got pizza a few times. »

At that, Nathan’s eyes snapped up to meet mine. He raised his eyebrows. « Are you serious ? Could you genuinely be living a more stereotypically Italian life ? »

« Well, it’s stereotypical for a reason, » I shot back. « I’m immersing myself in the culture. »

This time it was his turn to partake in the eye-rolling. Sighing to himself, he shook his head and drowned the last dregs of his wine before arranging his cutlery in the same neat formation as mine.

« Well, if that’s how you intend to go about your year abroad, then I at least expect you to learn all the different types of pasta. Maybe, if you’re feeling adventurous, you could even mix up which pasta you have each night ! Penne one night, fusilli another… »

General mocking was something I’d grown used to, but a sense of competition was an even stronger part of our relationship.

« Sure, » I said lightly, playing along. « It wouldn’t be too hard to find seven different types of pasta-one for each day of the week. »

« It wouldn’t be too hard to find one for each day of your year abroad, » Nathan corrected. « There are hundreds of them. »

« I’d go broke before then. »

Nathan shrugged, accepting this. Needless to say, that acceptance didn’t come hand in hand with his willingness to accept defeat.

« Okay, instead then, I challenge you to learn all the different types of pasta. That can be my personal year abroad challenge to you. »

I let out a small laugh. « Right… So, rather than improving my speaking and listening skills, increasing my self-confidence, gaining cultural awareness, or establishing independence in a foreign country, your challenge to me is to memorise types of pasta ? »

A small smile played at the corners of his lips. « Is that too difficult for you ? »

« You just said there were hundreds. »

He cocked his head to the side as he considered this. Eventually, he appeared to acknowledge the lack of realism that his challenge presented.

« Okay, just fifty, then. And don’t complain about fifty because that’s barely anything. It’s just a drop in the ocean of pasta. »

« You’re on, » I said, accepting the challenge with a confident smile. « Perhaps I won’t return to England with enhanced Italian skills, but I’ll most definitely be an expert in the field of pasta. »

Nathan laughed and extended his arm to tap his glass against mine. « I can’t think of a field you’d rather specialise in, Bella. »

As we continued to laugh and joke over our remaining wine, no doubt annoying the waiters who were hoping to vacate our table to make room for more customers to spend money in their restaurant, I began to feel myself relax more over the prospect of spending the year in a different country to Nathan. Maybe it was the effect of the wine, or maybe it was the knowledge that things between Nathan and me would unlikely change through the time apart. We still connected well, we still had fun and we still had that chemistry-which we’d no doubt be exploring when we headed back to the flat.

Rather than worrying that the distance would come between us, I needed to focus on the positive aspects that distance could bring : a new appreciation of our time together, the excitement of exploring a new country together, and an even stronger spark through lack of being around one another.

When I thought of it that way, the year should be a piece of cake and the long-distance business should be fun. And, if I kept up that attitude, maybe I’d be able to get through the year.

When we arrived back at the flat, I could see a strip of light illuminating the crack beneath Jasmine’s door. She’d obviously gone to bed but wasn’t yet asleep. Nathan poured us both some water while I pulled down my shutter before turning to look at my bed. Our tiny disagreement earlier came back to mind, and I briefly wondered whether sex would be different tonight — that’s if we even went ahead and had it after the previous discussion. Three weeks, although hardly a lifetime, was the longest we’d gone without seeing one another and I knew what Nathan was like when he’d not got laid in a while…

« Here, » he said, placing my glass of water on my bedside table.

I wriggled out of my jeans, but kept my eyes on him as he undressed. He was very nonchalant about it, examining all the photos blue tacked to my wardrobe door while simultaneously unbuttoning his shirt.

« I can tell it’s been a while since I’ve seen you, » I told him as he draped his shirt over the back of a chair. « Your body is much more toned than I remember. »

He chuckled. « No, it’s not that. I’ve been going to the gym a lot. »

« Oh. You never mentioned. »

« I’m glad it’s paying off anyway. » He grinned with pride, kicking off his jeans before climbing into bed.

Joining him, I twisted on my side and delicately ran my fingers over his biceps. Three weeks at the gym wasn’t enough to make a drastic change, especially when that could easily be confused with just a poor memory, but his muscles were undeniably bigger now.

« How come you’ve been going there, then ? »

He shrugged and brushed a strand of hair away from my eyes. « I find the evenings really long without you at the flat. Going to the gym easily kills an hour or two. Plus, you don’t see me as much these days… Might as well try to look my best for when you do. » He winked, the smile returning.

I rolled my eyes but smiled back. Before I could reply, though, he’d slid his hand beneath my hair to grip the back of my neck and pushed my head towards him.

Our lips collided in that same familiar, instinctive way — but the kissing felt new and unusual. Long distance was a dreadful thing for a relationship in a lot of ways, but that renewed feeling of chemistry, through lack of intimacy during the last few weeks, was definitely a positive. Nathan’s body was simply a bonus to that — whether coincidental or not — and heightened those sensual feelings of rekindled desire.

« I’ve missed you so much, » Nathan murmured against my mouth. « I can’t describe it… »

« Then show me, » I murmured back, sliding my hand down his athletic body until my fingers were tracing the prominent V-shape that disappeared into his boxers.

He mumbled something incoherent in response before flipping me onto my back and climbing on top in the same speedy movement. Of course, the sudden change in position caused the bed to creak and I winced, distracted momentarily from Nathan’s mouth that was showering my neck in kisses.

« Let’s move to floor, » I said, keeping my voice as quiet as I could.

Despite his reluctance earlier, Nathan was more than happy to comply, throwing the duvet into the space between the bed and desk. It shouldn’t have surprised me ; he wanted sex, and he wasn’t going to do anything that could potentially jeopardise his chances of getting it.

Unsurprisingly, however, the floor was far from comfy. My duvet provided little cushioning from the wood and instead slid about, meaning that Nathan was having trouble finding a firm grip.

« Come on, Bella, this is silly, » he said eventually with a sigh, after his knee had slipped from beneath him and he’d almost landed on top of me. « How about we leave it for tonight and then I can look at the bed tomorrow ? »

I raised a sceptical eyebrow. « You’re passing on sex ? »

« Not in a rejection kind of way ; just in a, you know, I’ve been looking forward to this for a while and it’s not really working kind of way. I don’t want to end up hurting you. »

« Okay, well… Do you want to do other stuff instead, then ? »

This time it was his turn to raise his eyebrows, but I could see the amusement in his eyes. « Other stuff ? »