05

It was now Monday, yet Steven still struggled to understand what Tasha had said to him at the party.

Granted, she was high, yet still, his mind kept replaying her words over and over again.

« It doesn’t matter if you hate me or not. We’re always gonna be at odds, especially in a place like Alabama. »

She thought that it didn’t really matter if he hated her or not, their differences were still immense, especially living in Alabama. He did not want to, but he saw where she was coming from.

He’d seen the way cops treated Malik, the way his mom talked about him, and the fact that people only liked Malik when he wasn’t talking about race. Which was the reason why he didn’t have many friends, many just saw him play basketball and chanted his name, never really knowing him.

Malik constantly educated his friends on the black experience, and Steven was glad that he had the opportunity to be told about it. Many of the students at Crest did not.

Steven’s own mom was problematic, working in the justice department, Steven saw how totally biased and ignorant she was. To her, black was a synonym to crime. His father, on the flip side, seemed to agree on the acceptance of everyone, yet he never corrected his wife.

« Fuck ! » Steven was frustrated, how was he gonna convince Tasha that he saw her dark skin, her thick curly hair, and voluptuous body and couldn’t help but only see beauty ?

He usually didn’t spend much time wondering what had first enchanted him about her. He remembered memories of seeing her in his class in middle school, back when he didn’t even dare talk to her.

She didn’t know, but he spent his eighth grade year in Alabama at Strample Middle School, where Tasha went too. He was always in the shadows then, doing his best not to be noticed by her.

He tried not to think too deeply about the fact that he was literally obsessed with her. A girl who barely even saw him as a friend.

Steven sighed and turned off the shower head, ready to get out of the shower before he was late to school.

After getting dressed in his school uniform, he made his way downstairs, and into his massive kitchen where the family cook was making breakfast.

« Good mornin’, Steve. How was your night ? » Aria, the cook, was a short, plump, sweet white woman in her fifties, who’d been working for the Morrisons for almost two decades.

Steven gave the woman who’d practically raised him a side hug. « Good morning, Aria. My night was okay. » He saw some bacon on the counter and moved away to snatch some.

« Hmm, » Aria mumbled knowingly. « Dreamed ‘bout that girl of yours, huh ? » She could see from his expression that something was bothering him, she could only guess it was Tasha. Only that girl could get to Steven like that.

« Yeah, but that’s not the problem… » He didn’t know whether he should tell Aria about his love life like that. The only reason she knew about Tasha was because Steven had told her when he was in eighth grade and needed to confide in someone.

« So what is the problem ? » Aria’s hands were gripping a spatula as she mixed her pancakes made from scratch.

Before he could tell her his troubles, his mom walked into the kitchen. She was dressed in her usual work attire—a black pencil skirt and a simple yet expensive blouse.

« How’s my boy doing this morning ? » She gave her only son a kiss on the cheek and brushed off his uniform.

Steven tried to smile, act like everything was normal, but he hadn’t been able to be his usual self around his mom in a long time. Since ever he could understand how truly ignorant many of her actions and words were.

She had noticed a slight change in their relationship, and like any mother, was afraid she was slowly losing her son. Although Steven did not know it, she was aware of his infatuation with Tasha.

She got knowledge of this last year, after a PTA meeting she’d attended, she’d noticed Steven’s stance and pose as he clearly flirted with an annoyed-looking girl in the hallway. A black girl.

She thought that perhaps it was only a phase he was going through, perhaps he did not even like the black girl. Except, she knew Steven had feelings for the girl because he always refused to date the girls she tried to set him up with. Hell, he refused to have a steady and long relationship with any girl.

« I’m doing fine, ma. I gotta get to school now. » Steven’s voice gave off the fact that he was not having the best day, and his mom already knew why.

She smiled a little and nodded. « Ok, honey. Drive safely. »

Steven didn’t even look at his mom but merely nodded as he made his way to the front door, not even bothering with breakfast.

When he got to school, he turned off his engine, grabbed his backpack, then he put his AirPods in and randomly picked Biggie Small’s Mo Money Mo Problems, a song he wholeheartedly agreed with.

A couple of people greeted him as he made his way to the school building, he was the type of person who was friendly with everyone yet had only about three core friends.

Once he was inside the building, his eyes naturally searched around for Tasha, without a second thought. Though, he caught himself so he tried to remove his mind from the girl who constantly occupied his brain.

Of course, he spotted her standing close to her locker alongside Kennedy as they both talked to some guy Steven did not know. As Steven stood in front of his own locker and opened it, he tried not to stare too hard at Tasha laughing with her friends. Especially, he couldn’t move his eyes away from the dude, who looked at Tasha in a way that pissed off Steven.

« Take a picture, man. It lasts longer. » Nelson’s joking voice surprised Steven out of his staring.

Steven quit staring at Tasha and got his English book out of his locker. Then he mean mugged his friend. « Man, shut up. »

He couldn’t even deny it, all his friends knew about his near obsession with Tasha.

« The guy is right, bruh. Cut the staring, it’s just a little creepy, y’know ? » Malik seemed to join the conversation out of nowhere, a grin on his face like always.

Steven rolled his eyes at his supposed friends and started walking away from them, without a real destination in mind, class didn’t start anytime soon.

Of course, it didn’t take long for his friends to start walking alongside him.

« So what’s your deal ? You’ve been moody since the party, did you catch your girl kissing some other dude or something ? »

Nelson couldn’t help but laugh at Malik’s blunt question, he admired his friend’s no bullshit way of life.

Steven, on the other hand, was in no mood of answering questions. « Nothing’s wrong, just tired. »

Nelson glared at Steven, knowing damn well his friend was lying. « Bullshit. You do realize we know you, right ? »

« I saw y’all at the party. Weren’t you guys holding each other and whatnot ? » Malik was beyond confused as to why Steven was in his feelings, the party seemed to have been a hit for him.

Steven sighed and rubbed his neck. « No, she was a little high. That’s why she even allowed me to touch her. But she rejected my ass, so. »

« Hold up. What ? » Nelson questioned extremely surprised.

« I mean she said that it doesn’t matter if I don’t hate her like she thought because we’re always gonna be too different, especially cause we live in fucking Alabama. »

Malik looked at his friend and shook his head, understanding where Tasha was coming from. « She isn’t totally wrong, y’know ? Like I can see where she’s coming from. »

« It doesn’t fucking matter if she’s black and I’m white though… » Steven absolutely did not care that Tasha was black. No, he was not colorblind. He saw her dark skin and saw what beauty truly meant.

« But it does matter though. See to you and Nelson it might not, but the fucking society we live in thinks differently. We have whole systems built on the fact that black people gotta remain oppressed. No offense, but while you get to live in the lavish suburbs Tasha isn’t so lucky. Know why ? »

Both Steven and Nelson stayed quiet, so Malik continued, « I mean it could be many reasons. Maybe Tasha’s father had to leave education as a kid to help provide alongside his parents cause they couldn’t get good paying jobs. »

He started again, « Or maybe as a kid, he didn’t have someone who told him he could be great so now he gotta do what he can to work his ass off to provide for his daughters. Either way, us black people one way or the other got the system against us. »

« And, by the way, Tasha’s family’s doing significantly better than thousands of other black families who have never been given equal opportunity but been locked in neighborhoods with no escape. »

Steven was starting to see why Tasha thought they were too different. She believed that their differences would always loom between them and they would never stick, like two mismatched pieces of a puzzle.

« Thank God my dad had parents that always pushed him to greatness unless my family would not be doing good right now. Still, my dad tells me he had to work twice as hard. » Malik’s role model was his father, he loved the tenacity that he saw in him since his childhood.

« You’re right, man, » Nelson directed to Malik. « My dad told me about how your father was constantly slammed with no real evidence in the media for being a phony businessman back in the day when he was just starting. »

Malik sighed, yet a smile also graced his lips. « Yeah, he always tells me that they should have done worse if they wanted to get rid of his black ass so bad. »

The three laughed, clearly able to imagine Mr. Fredricks saying something like that.

« I love your father, but he’s crazy as fuck, man, » Nelson said after laughing.

Malik shook his head and chuckled. « What do you expect, man ? He’s from Florida, everybody’s crazy as fuck over there. »