Wet Memories

ESME POV

He ate me out on my my Mom's funeral ~

I knelt at Mom's grave, the early morning dew soaking my knees through my jeans. Today marked five years since her death, and the pain hit fresh every time. But it wasn't just grief twisting in my gut.

This day always dragged up memories of Cole, too. On the same afternoon we buried her, after the pack left me alone to cry, he found me in the woods behind the cemetery.

I squeezed my eyes shut, the scene replaying sharp in my mind. I'd been sobbing against the wall when he appeared, his eyes dark and intense.

"You shouldn't be out here alone Esme," he said, his voice low and rough. He pulled me into his arms without asking, his hands firm on my back. I didn't resist; I'd wanted him for years, secretly watching him, craving his touch.

His fingers slid up my shirt, cupping my breasts, squeezing them hard enough to make me gasp. "Let me make you forget for a minute," he muttered, yanking my bra down. His mouth latched onto my left nipple, sucking it deep, his tongue flicking over the hard peak. I moaned, arching into him, my hands clutching his shoulders.

He switched to the right one, biting lightly, sending jolts straight to my core. His free hand pinched the other nipple, rolling it until I was wet and aching between my legs. "You like that, don't you?" he growled against my skin. I nodded, breathless as he sucked harder, his teeth grazing me just right.

We didn't go further, voices from the pack house pulled us apart but that touch haunted me. Every anniversary, the memories—it flooded back, leaving me hot and needy.

I stood up now, wiping dirt from my pants, and glanced at the rising sun. Time to sneak back. I did this every year: slip out at dawn to visit Mom alone, then creep into bed before anyone noticed. They'd assume I overslept and mock me for it, like always.

I darted through the passage, my heart pounding, and entered the pack house through the back door. The halls were quiet; no one was up yet. I tiptoed to my room, shut the door softly, and slid under the covers fully clothed.

Exhaustion hit fast from the early rise and the emotional drain. My body still buzzed from those memories, my thighs pressing together against the lingering ache.

I closed my eyes, drifting off for sleep but in after what seemed like a few minutes, cold water splashed on my face. I jolted awake immediately, gasping as the bed sheets tangled around me.

Nolan stood with an empty glass of water, sneering.

Water dripped from my hair. I wiped my face, heat still throbbing between my thighs. "It's Mom's anniversary, I know," I muttered.

He rolled his eyes. "And you're still curled up there like a worthless pup. Get up.”

His face twisted in disgust. "Are you planning to sleep all day, Esme? For once, act like an Alpha's daughter, even if you can't shift like one," he sneered, setting the glass down hard on my nightstand.

I sat there, stunned at the cold reality of his words. "Nolan, I was just... I didn't mean to oversleep," I pretend to stammer, pulling the covers up to hide my flushed skin. He rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his broad chest.

"Save it. Cole's coming back today, and the last thing I need is you embarrassing the family in front of my best friend. He's made something of himself in the city, unlike you who couldn't achieve anything when you were sent there." His voice dripped with mockery and I felt the familiar stab of pain in my chest.

Cole was my brother’s best friend, he had left two years ago after high school, chasing his dreams while I stayed behind, crushed under the weight of our pack's expectations. I'd had a crush on him since we were teens, watching him train with Nolan, his loyalty to my brother made him even more untouchable.

But even today, I still remember his touch... God, I must have been fantasizing a lot these days.

Nolan turned to leave, but paused at the door. "Hurry up. Dad's already in a mood, and if you're late for the memorial today, it'll be your fault, just like everything else." He stomped out, slamming the door behind him.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed, my wet nightshirt clinging to my body, reminding me of my misery. Mom had died five years ago, on my sixteenth birthday, during a pack raid gone wrong.

She was trying to protect me when a rival wolf attacked, and somehow, the pack blamed me for distracting her. "If you could shift, she might still be alive," Dad had said at the funeral, his voice flat and accusing. Nolan, who was supposed to be my big brother, turned on me after that, treating me like an outsider in our own home.

No one in the pack believed I was his baby sister anymore; whispers followed me everywhere, calling me the cursed one who caused her death. Mom was the only one who loved me unconditionally, shielding me from Dad's disappointment over my failure to shift.

Without her, the house felt empty, cold, like a prison where I was tolerated but never wanted. I stripped off my wet clothes, tossing them in the hamper, and pulled on jeans that hugged my plus-size curves. A simple black top followed, something somber for the anniversary.

I glanced at the clock—, I was already late for my third-year college classes at the pack's university. At least Dad and Nolan let me attend, though they reminded me constantly it was a waste since I couldn't contribute to the pack. "You're just taking up space," Nolan had said last week during dinner, shoving his plate away.

I freshened up quickly and dressed, grabbed my backpack, stuffing in my notebooks, and headed downstairs, avoiding the family photos on the wall that showed happier times. The kitchen was empty, Dad might probably be at the pack meeting hall already.

I skipped breakfast, my stomach too knotted from Nolan's words and the intensity of the dream I had earlier.

Reaching outside, I hailed a cab, the driver nodding curtly as I gave him the address to the pack college. "Rough morning?" he asked, glancing at me in the rearview mirror. "You could say that. Family stuff," I replied, staring out the window at the passing trees. He chuckled softly. "Alpha families are the worst. Always some drama with power and hierarchies."

We drove in silence after that, the cab weaving through the roads toward campus. Mom used to drive me to school, telling stories about her own shifts to make me feel less broken.

"It'll happen when you're ready, Esme," she'd say, hugging me tight. But it never did, and after her death, Nolan's cruelty ramped up, he'd lock me out during full moons, laughing as I shivered outside. "Maybe the cold will force your wolf out," he'd taunt, while Dad just ignored it all.

The cab pulled up near the college gates and I paid the fare, stepping out into the crisp air. Students milled around, some shifting playfully in the open fields. I shouldered my bag, heading toward the crosswalk. "Watch where you're going, freak," a pack member muttered as he brushed past me, his elbow jabbing my side. I ignored him, focusing on the road ahead as cars was zooming by.

As I stepped off the curb to cross the road, tires screeched and a black SUV swerved too close. Pain exploded in my side as the bumper hit and clipped me, sending me sprawling onto the ground.

My head hit the ground hard, my vision blurring and I heard shouts around me. "What the hell? Is she okay?" someone yelled from the car. I tried to push up but darkness tugged at the edges, my body aching from the impact.

The driver door opened, and heavy footsteps approached. "Esme? Shit, are you alright?" a familiar voice said, rough and edged with annoyance.

I looked up through the haze, my heart skipping seeing Cole knelt beside me, his face stern, no trace of warmth. "Get up. You're blocking traffic," he added, grabbing my arm to pull me to my feet. Pain shot through my ribs but I stood up, dusting myself off, the dream's heat clashing with this cold reality.

"Why'd you hit me?" I gasped, clutching to my side. He scowled, glancing around at the gathering crowd.

"You’re crossing out without looking. Typical Esme, always causing problems." His words cut deep, hiding any concern behind indifference, just like I'd feared after two years apart. Nolan would kill him if he showed anything else apart from hate for me.

"Come on, I'll drive you to the clinic," he said, pulling me toward the SUV.

But just then, a sudden jolt ran through me, quick and hot. My knees gave out for a second but his hand shot out holding me steady.

He went still and I frowned. “What’s wrong?”

His eyes stayed on me, unreadable but his jaw clenched.

Then he dropped his hand and stepped back.“Nothing. Get in the car.”