Chapter 18 : Showdown

Ella:

I looked up and saw Joe approaching the table. From the look on his face, it seemed as though he saw what had transpired in the last few minutes.

He sat down, folded his hands and spoke anxiously, “Ella, I can explain!”

Tears started brimming in the corner of my eyes. “Were you with Alice on Christmas?” I asked, clenching my jaw with anger.

He cowered with fear replying, “Ella, I meant to tell you!”

“I was going to introduce you to my family and you said, you couldn’t come as you had been admitted to the hospital after suffering from a seizure enroute to my house, did you say that or not!? I emphasized for an answer.

“Ella, I did but...Alice is lying...she tried to push herself onto me!” A normally over-confident Joe seemed to be rambling for words today.

“Was I not good enough for you?” My voice was shivering and starting to grow louder.

“It’s not you, it’s me” Joe replies trying to convince me.

“Damn right, it's you!, you were trying to stand in two different boats, isn’t it? ” I stood up and slammed the table as I confronted him while hopelessly trying to hold back my tears.

Patrons seated around the neighbourhood tables swung around to see what the commotion was about. Usually, I wasn’t someone who would react the way I did right now, but I did not seem to care.

Joe had never seen this side of me before. He started faltering for words and said, “Ella, you need to calm down, please sit down”

I was in no mood to heed his request. Throwing his stupid surprise gift at him, I screamed even louder, “You’re a fucking cheat, Joe Smith!!!”

He stood up, came closer and tried to pacify me saying, “You’re over-reacting, let’s get out of here”

I slap him tight and hard across his face leaving him stupefied. Still not satisfied, I grab the glass of wine on the table and splash the liquid all across his face screaming, “There, I have overreacted, go fuck yourself!”

Saying these words I left the restaurant. I started feeling like there was a knot in my stomach and wanted to throw up. Before I realized what was happening, I instinctively bent down and vomited on the side of the road.

People around started looking with some of them staring probably sad at the sorry mess I had become in that very moment. I felt like I was going to collapse. It’s a good thing the Madison Square Park was close by.

I grab a bottle of water from a nearby pharmacy and park myself on the bench. After gulping a few deep breaths, I close my eyes and rest my neck atop the bench, still trying to make sense of what actually happened.

In a way, I had compromised on the kind of man I wanted to be with because magazines, tabloids and Mary’s antics forced me to be practical and settle for the average Joe even though Helen and Jane tried warning me.

I take a deep breath “How could I be so stupid? This is going to be the first and the last time I settle, because I will never make myself emotionally available again.”