Orange Blossom

By Florence

My parents didn't allow me to go out much; they thought they lived in the last century. But I always managed to go out; I was dying to go dancing. It's true that the people in the places I liked to go were a bit older than me, but several of my school friends had more freedom and went.

Many years ago, the place where I live with my parents and my two brothers was a village, but now it is a small city, where everyone knows each other, at least within the same neighborhood, but that doesn't stop it from being a city.

The thing is, my soul is freer than my parents', or at least we're from a different generation.

I intend to pursue a university degree; I need a year and a half more for that.

So, by having more tools to progress in life, I will earn the respect of my parents, especially my father.

He encourages my brothers, just for being boys. Gabriel is 14 and he's already teaching him to drive. Of course, I made such a scene that he ended up teaching me too, even though I'm forbidden from driving, and since I'm a minor I don't have a license, unless my father gets me a special permit, and of course, he doesn't plan to do that. I think as soon as my brother turns 16, the first thing he'll do is get that damn permit so Gabriel can drive without any problems.

I'm not jealous of my brothers, never, I adore them, I just demand equality between men and women, at least in some areas.

The era in which women only did housework is over.

I intend to train as a professional and work in the career I choose.

I have dreams, like any girl my age.

I was helping my brother wash my father's car, although I was the one washing it, while Gabriel only turns on the tap to let the water run, for my father, I am the one who helps him.

I was rinsing off the foam when a car passed by with the music quite loud. When I looked to see who it was, my heart beat strongly.

It was Alejo.

My crush, or rather, my love since I can remember.

He is 22 years old, he is a neighbor, or rather he was a neighbor, his parents live at the end of the block, but he has not lived here for some years now, although he comes quite often, at least once a month and on vacation, although he does not spend the vacation here, he only comes for a few days and to spend the end of the year holidays, then they leave with his family.

Some say they have a summer mansion in Punta del Este, in the neighboring country of Uruguay.

It's possible, his parents' house is the most beautiful and largest in the neighborhood.

They're simple people, at least his parents are. Alejo isn't; he always looks down on everyone, but he's so cute…

I don't want to look at him anymore, I feel like my love for him is slipping away and everyone is going to realize how I feel.

Alejo doesn't know I exist, he never looked at me, much less greeted me.

Because of the age difference, we don't have a single friend in common.

Alejo has some friends around here who are just as conceited as he is.

I sigh and turn my head; my brother is looking at me.

-That?

I ask him, trying to hide it, while I continue with my task.

—Were you looking at Alejo?

He asks me directly.

Okay, I didn't hide it that well.

-You're crazy?

I say it indifferently.

—It seemed that way.

—Are you stupid? I was thinking about how nice it is to drive.

—Dad won't let you do it.

—I know, he's a sexist.

—I'm going to tell him what you're saying.

As if my stupid brother hadn't accused me, my problems are going to get even worse.

I need to be less transparent and hide everything Alejo makes me feel.

Many of my classmates have boyfriends or guys they go out with, and most of them are no longer virgins.

I've never dated anyone... I'm in love with Alejo, I would give him my virginity, he arouses many sensations in me, an intense feeling is born in my gut when I remember him.

Only my friend Karla knows what I feel, and I trust her, just as she trusts me.

Without knowing I exist, Alejo arrives home.

His mother comes out to greet him and laughter can be heard in the distance, as well as applause.

When my gaze falls upon a banner, one of those that are usually used to congratulate someone.

"Welcome, lawyer Alejo, we are proud of you."

The sign said.

I smile despite myself.

Apparently, he graduated as a lawyer.

I suppose he'll come around less now, because the town isn't really a town.

He must work in his family's company.

They are so discreet that I don't know what the company does. I once heard that they also import something, but nobody really knows what they import or what they do.

Some say they have factories, others say they import…in reality nobody knows and those who do know are their friends, who also have a certain economic level, higher than the rest and do not talk about the subject.

It seems that for those people, the rest of us mortals are insects and that social classes are so different that they shouldn't be mixed.

I live well without them…except for Alejo.

I truly love him.

Others say that Alejo always returns to see Marina, his girlfriend.

I don't think they're dating. She's 24 or 25, two or three years older than him, and it's true that I've seen them together and kissing a few times, but I've also seen her kissing other guys, not so young, from the neighborhood.

Marina is your typical popular girl.

She's beautiful, I admit it, even though I don't like to acknowledge it.

She is tall, she must be a little over 1.70 meters tall, with long, silky black hair, and blue eyes that attract everyone's attention.

Her body seems perfect, like a model's, an impressive bust, which she always shows off by revealing more than she should, but all men go crazy for it.

Her waist is small and her tail looks perfect too.

When he finished high school, they said he passed because he did favors for a teacher.

I didn't know what that meant, although now I can imagine.

Nor can I assert that this is the case.

I suppose they're finally going to get engaged, then get married, and have beautiful children, since they're both gorgeous.

I try to hold back the tears when I think about that.

I would like to win Alejo's love; I wouldn't kiss anyone else in his absence.

I would give myself entirely to him.

I would shower him with kisses and…

I'd better finish rinsing my dad's car wheels, otherwise I'm going to be in trouble.

How I would love to have him in front of me…to hold onto him little by little…to love him…

I start drying the car and I see another car, a new one, park in front of Alejo's parents' house.

Luciana, Alejo's sister, gets out of the car. I think she's 30 years old. She arrived with her husband and her little daughter, who is a baby of a few months old, as beautiful as her mother.

Luciana is a beautiful woman, she is also a lawyer, although I'm not entirely sure, but I know she has a university degree.

She appears to be the female version of her brother, in terms of beauty.

He's much nicer than Alejo, but he's not exactly overflowing with charm either, but at least he doesn't look down on everyone, as if the rest of us were cockroaches.

Given this, I don't understand how I can love Alejo; the truth is, he occupies all my thoughts.

I want to shout into his heart and have it open up to me.

I wish he would forget about the world and take me out of the loneliness that always surrounds me, that he would take my hands and never let go.

I feel silly for aspiring to his love, but I can't help it.

If only I could forget it, but I know that's not an option; it's ingrained in my soul.

Until he gets married, which I suppose will be soon, since he graduated.

He's going to do it with her, I don't think Marina loves him like I do.

I can't compete with her, she's an adult and beautiful, everyone sees me as a child, even though I feel like a woman and I would give my life to her.

I close my eyes and imagine his kisses and caresses; I prefer him above all the men in the world.

Karla tells me to forget about him, that Alejo will never pay any attention to me, they're probably right, but I don't know how I can forget him.

I dream about him.

We had dinner at home and I reminded my mother that I was going to stay overnight at my friend's house that night.

My father looks at me suspiciously and tells me I can't go.

I'm tired, it's Saturday night and everyone is going dancing and Alejo will probably go too. His friends usually go to a certain nightclub, which my friend and I managed to get into despite our age, because by dressing flashily, they don't ask us for ID.

I sent a message to my friend, telling her that I was planning to escape; I had already done it a couple of times.

My bedroom window overlooks the courtyard, and luckily I don't share the room with my brothers.

That's why it's easy, my parents go to sleep early and my siblings don't bother me at night.

I complained to my father so that he wouldn't distrust me, but I didn't get his permission.

I helped my mother wash the dishes while my father watched television, a very boring program that only interested him.

My brothers were silent, but each one was focused on their cell phone.

When my father watched his program, not even a fly could buzz, but we couldn't get up from the table until he said so, except for my mother and me to wash the dishes.

He definitely thinks he's in the last century.

The silence was only interrupted by the sound of running water.

I didn't insist with my mother either, since she didn't have any say in the matter at home.

I see life differently; in a marriage there has to be camaraderie, they have to support each other...love is something else.

I also don't imagine that they enjoy sex; I don't think my mother has ever had an orgasm in her life. I imagine that my father decides when and under what circumstances they have sex and that only what he wants matters.

Sex between them must be traditional, no oral sex, much less anal sex.

I don't even know why I think such nonsense about my parents.

I'm not interested.