My Broken Heart

Finally, after days and days of hard work, Our senior year exams were over. We were free from what we call hellhole. I was so excited to see him again and tell him the news that would change our lives forever.

We had absolutely no plans for the future, not yet at least. All this time our main focus was only on our upcoming exams, which thankfully ended. But in the end, things turned against our wish and God blessed us with a baby and now just a little bit of patience and then a little bundle of joy will be joining with our little family.

I was seven weeks pregnant with a healthy baby. At first, I thought that I had some viral disease. Don't blame me! The dizziness and nausea made me think that way up until yesterday.

Me carrying his child inside my womb made my heart jolt with happiness. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs saying 'I am officially going to be his. We are going to welcome our new little family member!!!' Unfortunately I was on the college campus and I didn't want to scare away the students.

I wanted to see his face. I wanted to see his expression. I wanted to laugh at him seeing him in a shocking state with mouth wide open, unable to believe if what he just heard was true or his ears were betraying his imagination.

Maybe I would shoot a video and keep it as a memory to reminisce in the future. Or maybe I would show his reaction to my little baby when he or she grows up

I wanted to pinch his cheek saying 'Yes, it is true. We're gonna have a family of our own' I wanted to enjoy all the moments: when he comes closer and embraces me in his arms tightly when he'll say he is extremely delighted to have this baby!!!

I wanted to feel his fingers caressing my cheeks as he wipes my tears with his thumb and gives me an assuring smile saying 'Everything will be alright and I'll be here for you no matter what happens'

"What if he will not be happy with the news?" My conscience asked me again. I had this question running through my mind since yesterday.

'Nope.' He was on cloud nine when Rachel, his sister, revealed her pregnancy. He discussed how he is going to take care of the baby and how he is going to spoil him.

Rachel told us yesterday after confirming the gender from the doctor that it's gonna be a boy for her.

"Don't worry sweetheart, Dad will take care of you" I said to my little peanut while rubbing my stomach lovingly. I became so attached to this baby overnight. The baby was made out of our love.

Even though I was drowning in the sea of my deep thoughts, I didn't miss watching my man walking towards the parking area whilst whistling and spinning the car keys around his forefinger. No doubt, he will make the sexiest dad ever. I grinned and adored the beauty of my husband.

He looked dashing, clad in his white T-Shirt and black Jeans. His hair was a mess as he had raked his hands through it multiple times. His face was shining with armour and he had a faint smile on his lips. He was probably thinking of me.

He expected me to be there in the parking area, just like any other day. Oops! I'm late. "Kayish!!" I called his name but it didn't reach his ears.

The burning sensation of bile raising down my throat was getting worse from our continuous lovemaking and it got worse because of the previous night activities. We had a heavy fight in our own way.

I started to think that he would tear me apart by his strength. Usually, he behaves like a gentleman as smooth, but yesterday night it felt different. It seemed like he was in a rush.

I started to run like a penguin towards the parking area after him, I couldn't feel my legs. To be honest I was so sore that I couldn't even walk. I stood in front of him panting heavily, It took me a fine second to calm down.

The moment he saw me, he gave me a huge grin and hugged me.

"How was your exam?" he asked.

"It was good. Yours?"

"As usual." He shrugged his shoulder. I smiled at him. He was the topper of our college. These exams were a child's play for him.

"What the matter, Riya?" He asked once he noticed me playing with my wedding ring. It was a habit of mine to fiddle with my fingers whenever I would get nervous.

"Kayish, I--I wanted to tell you something," I told him still fiddling nervously with my wedding ring. He raised my chin with his hand and I leaned on his touch.

"Riya, I wanted to tell you something too" He said making me furrow my brows. What is he going to tell me?

"Let's break up." He blurted out.

"What?" I looked at him with my jaw dropped on the floor. Unable to control myself, I busted into laughter.

"Kayish, I am here to telling you a piece of good news but you are joking around." I playfully hit his shoulder. Breaking up is not in our dictionary and he never uses these words even for a prank.

Instead of flashing me a smile, he folded his hand against his chest and raised his eyebrows. "What does it look like? Why do you think that this is some kind of a joke, Miss. Kader?" He asked.

I froze on my spot the moment I heard him addressing me from my Surname instead of calling me babe or wifey like he used to. Something was up, his playfulness all gone, he was back in his serious mode.

"Kayish enough. Please stop this." My eyes were welled with tears. Why is he playing with me? How does he find this funny?.

"Well, Miss. Kader, I am telling you the truth. I'm getting bored of acting as a good boyfriend. More precisely, a good husband. I was never interested to tie knots with anyone, let alone you." He pointed a finger towards me.

I wanted to laugh at him again but I am afraid. Afraid of thinking if he is telling me the truth.

"Why?" I asked. Tears were pooling down my cheeks.

"Do you remember, Jan 2 - 2012?" he asked. My heart pounded in my chest. Why is he asking this now? That was our first encounter and that didn't end well.

"You humiliated me in front of everyone. You fucking slapped me just because I kissed you once. That day I promised myself that I will make you mine and make your life miserable." He said.

"But you didn't allow me to touch your body. So I ended up marrying you to spoil you. This marriage is nothing to me, it's just a key I used to get your sanity" his every word stabbed me in my heart.

"I need your body, not you," he whispered in my ears. My body completely went numb and my legs were shaking. He can't be serious.

"Now I took my revenge and I want to get rid off this drama." He took an envelope from his pant's pocket and tore them into pieces.

"This...This is the only evidence of our marriage. Take it." He threw the pieces of paper on my face.

"Well, you wanted to tell me of good news, right? I hope it's not a piece of good news anymore." With that, he crashed his lips against mine aggressively. This was the time I ever flinched in his touch.

It was anything but a passionate kiss, the kiss projected all his anger and hatred he felt towards me.

He broke the kiss and looked at me. "I'm leaving today, so don't waste your time looking for me." Then he turned his heels and hopped into his car. After a while, I heard a scratching sound of a tyre which means he left me. He left. He left me alone. He left us alone.

I stood there for almost an hour. So all these years he just pretended that he loved me? And he did all that because of a bloody fucking revenge??

When did I become so naive? Why didn't I realize he was playing with my feelings? But he didn't give any place to think, he was faking around because I felt his love was true but he proved me wrong.

I left my parents because of him, I trusted him too much and now I feel ashamed of being a used paper. His used paper.

My heart refused to accept the fact that he left. All our sweet memories started to haunt my head. I doubt if it will still be a sweet memory after what he did to me.

The pounding in my head was getting so bad that I felt like it will burst out anytime. Soon, I started to see black dots around me. The next thing I know, I blacked out thinking of the baby and I.

My baby. He doesn't deserve to know about it at all.