FIVE

Oh, he was charming. She had to admit that. Tam Jones was one of the most pleasant, amusing men she had ever met in her life. And that voice was every bit as sexy as she remembered. He smelled…rich, exotic—of sandalwood and incense. She couldn’t define it but as she sat next to him in the restaurant, waiting for the waiter to bring her Braille menu, she inhaled deeply, her head flooding with that sexy scent of his.

The waiter approached and she held out her hand, waiting, as he said in an overloud voice, “Here’s the menu, ma’am. Just let us know if you need any help ordering.”

With a blank expression, she raised her voice a few notches as she replied, “Thank you.” As he started to walk away, she heard Mara snickering and Kat’s lips curled up in response. “Maybe I should have my ears checked. Everybody seems to think I’m deaf, too.”

Mara laughed. “People don’t think, sweetie. You know that.”

“Well, yeah. But I always knew that,” she said drolly, running her fingers over the menu. She wasn’t hungry. Nerves jumped in her belly, doing a hot little cha-cha. Being out in public, being out with a man for the first time in years… She knew there was no way she could eat much.

People were staring at her. She could feel their eyes. Under the table, Zeb lay quietly, his head resting by her feet. She’d heard somebody mutter about the dog when they first came in, then the abrupt silence after the woman’s companion said,She’s blind! Be quiet.

As Tam said her name, she forced her attention back to him, trying to block out her anxiety about being away from her condo. Nothing to worry about. She’d made it here in one piece. She could handle lunch in public.

Nothing to worry about. Yeah, right.

Focusing her attention back on Tam, she pasted a polite smile on her face as he asked, “How long have you lived in Gatlinburg?”

She shrugged, a thoughtful frown on her face. “Off and on for more than ten years. I used to spend time in Chicago but I’ve been here pretty much all the time for the past few years.”

“What do you do?”

For a moment, her fingers stilled on the menu.What do you do? It had been a very long time since she had heard that. On the rare occasion that she did meet new people, so many of them assumed she didn’t do anything. “I’m a counselor. I had a double major in college…decided to use the psych one just this past year.”

She had to fight not to shiver at the sound of his voice. Did he look as good as he sounded, as good as he smelled? Swallowing, she tried to block that out of her mind and focus on his voice.

“And you work out of your house?”

She forced a smile. “Telephone counselor. It’s a suicide help line.” Her lashes dropped. “I had a sister who killed herself when she was fourteen.”

* * * * *

As Kat paced her room alone a few hours later, she rubbed her hands up and down her arms.

In her mind’s eye, she could see a picture of him. Mara had described him in vivid detail, dark skin—teak colored—startling pale blue eyes, rich dark hair, a few shades darker than mahogany. Exotic, Mara had said.

Exotic, to go with that voice, with its indeterminate accent.

Jones… What a simple name, one that didn’t fit the image she had of him.

Tam. It suited the picture she had in her mind of him. It sounded strong, proud, as rich as that low, husky voice.

Something inside her belly tightened as she thought of him, recalled the rich sandalwood scent of his body—sandalwood, musk and male. Her mouth watered as she remembered breathing that scent in, drowning in it.

Mara had told her, “He stares at you like you’re a chocolate sundae and he’s a recovering chocoholic about to fall off the wagon.”

A confirmed chocoholic, Kat knew exactly the look Mara was talking about. Intense, hungry, greedy. Hot little pangs of nerves darted through her before she shoved the idea aside.

She was blind, for crying out loud. And even when she could see, she hadn’t been a major prize. After all, look what Brian had done to her. Messed around on her, lied to her, deceived her. If she was anything special, her husband wouldn’t have cheated on her.

Kat resisted the urge to go into the now empty studio, resisted the urge to run her hands over the dried ridges of paint on the unfinished canvas. She couldn’t keep doing that. It had been her New Year’s resolution to try and move past the remnants of her old life and find something else.

The counseling helped. She was making a difference there, and it didn’t matter to the people on the phone if she could see or not.

It filled the emptiness of her days, but she needed so much more.

Today had been a start though.

I went outside…

And not just to go to a doctor appointment. She had actually gone out and eaten at a restaurant. One of the mundane things that she used to take for granted. She had felt the icy sting of snowflakes as they hit her face, melting away, and had felt the wind blowing through her hair as they’d walked to the restaurant.

And it had felt good. With a slow smile, she promised she’d go out again. Soon.

It had almost felt normal, after the first hour.

She stopped in front of the mirror that Mara’s boyfriend had hung up for her a few days ago. Lee was funny, sharp-witted and he didn’t treat her like an invalid. Once upon a time, they had all gone out together—she, Brian, Lee and Mara. Sometimes Jenise had tagged along—sometimes she had brought a date.

They’d all had so much fun. She missed that.

Damn it, she had to get back into life.

“I’m losing myself here,” she murmured, reaching out with a seeking hand, touching her fingers to the surface of the mirror, lids drooping as the heat that seemed to radiate from it seeped into her pores.

Something teased her nose—a hot, spicy scent—unlike anything she could remember smelling before. Under her hand, the mirror pulsed. She flinched but she didn’t pull it away. Something about this mirror—

Behind her, she heard a soft whine. Zeb had woken from his nap. She whistled to him and heard the clack of his nails on the floor as he padded up to her. Stroking his head, she said in a thick voice, “I’m pitiful, you know that? I talk to you, and to a mirror, more than I do to people.”