TWO

The restaurant was intimate. Nice and dim inside as candles cast romantic shadows against gleaming wood tables and railings. Music played but it was muted as they were led to a table by a server who was clearly happy to see them. Probably Xander most of all, and Pippa got why. She liked looking at him too.

Even better, it got them a great table off in a corner with a view of the rest of the room and a basket of bread with olive oil and balsamic vinegar before they’d even sat down.

Xander pulled out her chair and made sure she received a menu first. Oddly, she wasn’t on guard because of it as she might have been back home. Where such behavior from a man often meant control. It nearly always came with ulterior motives.

Xander did seem to like taking charge. But he also appeared to have good manners, and she imagined—though it annoyed her to think of him with someone else—he was the same on any date. He gave off caregiver vibes, which she was fine with because she had her own tendencies toward such things.

It was nice to be taken care of in small ways. It meant someone else was thinking about her comfort. Her safety. Her pleasure.

The want to share that, to show those things to someone else, was strong. A pang echoed through her chest. A moment when she missed the only other person who called to her and her desire to spoil. Pippa wanted to comfort and take care of Hamish, but he got a little freaked out by it, so she’d reined those impulses in and accepted him for where he was in his life.

And it was time to stop thinking of anyone else when she was having the beginnings of what she hoped was a nice dinner with a guy she found herself really liking.

He scooted his chair closer to hers. Taking up space but not crowding her.

“You smell really good,” she said without thinking.

“Thanks. One of the cousins makes perfume oils, and she made this one for me on my birthday last year. She says her goal is to create signature scents for everyone in the family. There are a lot of us, so good luck to her.”

Without thinking, Pippa leaned in and took a long sniff at his neck. Embarrassed, she began to rear back and apologize, but he hummed in a very sexy way, putting a hand at the back of her chair. He liked it. Okay then.

She was terrible at this whole thing. Dating and trying to monitor her reactions so she didn’t freak anyone out with her weirdness. But she hadn’t scared him off. Not yet.

Emboldened, Pippa said, “A perfumer? Add that to the actors, dancers, painters, musicians, and tattoo artists.” The whole family just seemed to burst with a need to create things.

“Right?”

Once they’d ordered, he poured them both a glass of wine.

“We’ve got a software developer, two social workers, a few ranchers, caterers, security types who work with my dads and my uncle, to balance everything out.”

“Your dads who are married to your mom who is, well, let’s be honest here, an icon. I feel like that bumps it up into artist territory on the cool scale.”

He snickered. “Fair point. They like to think they’re regular dudes, but yes. The fact that they run security for rock-and-roll tours and the like does bump them into the artsy category.” He paused and then asked, “What about you and your family? Any funky jobs as cool as yours?”

“My sister, Rebecca, is an executive assistant to a high-profile attorney. She’s got a gift for getting people to do whatever she wants them to and her boss benefits, so she gets paid really well and has excellent health care and a retirement plan. She and Vivi, that’s her fiancée, live in Queen Anne. My other sister, Esther, lives in Fairbanks with my brother-in-law. He’s a pilot for a small regional airline, and she’s a corporate travel specialist. Essentially, she handles the travel for various businesses. It’s a nifty job though because she gets to travel all over the place. Most everyone else I know is a grease monkey like me with some artists tossed into the mix.”

“Are you close with your parents?”

“No.”

There was a massive period at the end of that one-word sentence. So heavy he barely suppressed his wince. “Apologies.” The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her feelings or make her uncomfortable.

She waved it away and kept eating her ziti. Finally, she said, “The sisters I told you about? The three of us are very close. They’re more like aunts than siblings. They’ve raised me in a lot of ways.”

“The ones you moved to Washington with?” He remembered the story she’d related while getting her ink.

“Yes. I was fifteen. They were twenty-two. Twins. Well, they’re still twins.” Her laugh was genuine and affectionate, but he thought about all she’d shared, and he had a moment of wonder at how easily she’d found some pleasure in the midst of it.

There was a lot to unpack with what she’d revealed. Questions he desperately wanted the answers to but knew he’d have to wait until she trusted him more. Why did she move to another state when she was just fifteen? Her sisters had been barely legal adults. Clearly it was about her parents she wasn’t close with.

Protectiveness rose in him in a relentless wave. It took him aback. Rarely was that depth of feeling aroused by anyone outside his immediate circle.

“The funny thing is, Rebecca applied for an administrative position at the security company your dads run. We’d just moved here, and she didn’t have much of a resume, so she didn’t get it. But small world, huh? She said Todd recommended another place that was looking for people and was willing to train. He was kind. Which is not always as usual as it should be. Kindness when you need it most is the best sort.”

“Small world indeed. That’s wild. I’m glad—but not surprised—to hear he made a good impression. He’s a solid dude, and I’m lucky to have had him and my dad raising me.” He added, “I call one Pop, that’s Todd, and Ben is Dad.”

“Aw, I really like that. Plus, if they both have a different parent name, you can avoid a lot of pronoun confusion with all those he and his in any given conversation.” She laughed, and he liked her so much for it.

He also liked that she didn’t seem overly fascinated or in possession of any negative feelings about the shape of his parents’ relationship, and he said so.

“Oh. Well, Jessi Roberts is one of my closest friends, and she’s involved in a triad. I’ve spent a lot of time around her and Adam, and Mick is my boss, so I suppose it’s not that unusual to me anymore. Your parents have been together decades by this point, so they must be doing something right.”

Xander wouldn’t have said it was a test really. But how people reacted to his parents and their relationship was nearly always an indicator of who they were inside. He’d learned that the hard way over the years, and it had left him even more protective than he already had been.

“I’ve heard a lot of ignorant bullshit, but that matters less when I’ve always had a close circle of loved ones who made the bad stuff not quite as bad.”

She cocked her head and then smiled softly. Xander gave in to his desire to tuck an errant curl back from her face.

“You test my control,” he said softly.

“Me?”

It had been a long time since he’d craved someone this badly. She called to every aspect of him. All he wanted was more.

He told her, “Somehow, I think I can manage this growing need to know you better. Maybe it’d be easier though if I knew you were feeling similarly.”

Her expression brightened, and she said, “I am.”

He nodded and took her hand, turning it to kiss the inside of her wrist. “Other than being a mechanic, what do you do for fun?”

“Rebecca and I have season tickets to the 5th Avenue Theater and the Pacific Northwest Ballet, so we regularly see shows. I love theater and live music.” She paused. “I grew up in a family who looked upon such things as ungodly. We only had praise music during church services, and we didn’t dance. I took a dance class at the community center near our apartment when we moved up here. I’m not that good, but I make up for it with my absolute love of movement. So now I watch incredibly talented people do it.”

The curve of her lips into a different sort of smile chased arcs of chemistry between them.

“How about I make you dinner Friday night? You can come over and watch a movie.” It wasn’t so much that he felt an urgency in asking her out. But a yearning.

“Friday night my sister and I have tickets to the ballet. I’ll be away this weekend. Rennie, me, and Jessi are all heading to an arts festival up in Port Townsend. I’ll be back Sunday night.”

“Tuesday night?” He had Wednesdays off. Also, he wasn’t entirely used to being told no the first time he asked someone out. Huh.

“Depends on the movie,” she told him, teasing. “Your family has a horror movie thing. I’m good with most horror, but I don’t like excessively gory, rapey, or violent. Your aunt and uncle have good horror movie taste.”

She’d even had movie night with them? “Seriously gonna have to talk to Rennie about hiding you from me for so long. It’s…I don’t know…I’m a little bummed you were right there, a step outside my vision the whole time.” He ran a hand over his beard.

Pippa’s intake of breath sent a blast of heat through him. Tangled him in the way she reacted. Left him utterly aware of her.

“I don’t know if I’d have been ready for you even six months ago, much less a year.”

Her quiet words were unsettling. But in a way he wanted to wallow in. Still, he let it go because he needed to think about it before commenting.

Instead, he replied, “I’ve got a pretty large collection of movies and access to streaming channels, so I’ll come up with some options for you to choose from.”

“All right. I’d like that.”

After sharing a slice of chocolate torte, he drove them back to where her truck was parked. He really wanted to kiss her for hours, but first he needed to be sure she was right there with him in that.

He’d been chewing on what she’d said over dinner about not being ready, and though he should have left it alone, Xander found himself reaching out to touch her. The swell of her cheek called to his fingertips, and he gave in. Unable to stop his satisfied grunt when she leaned into him.

“Earlier you said you didn’t know if you’d have been ready for me before, why is that?”

When she’d made the comment—blurted it more like—she’d been high on bravado. But right then it was harder. Pippa considered her words carefully. For both their sakes.

She decided on, “You’re a lot. Big and tattooed and pierced. You fill a space effortlessly. You’re very sexy and so confident in all those things. Not a surprise, but I find those traits attractive.” She sucked in a breath as she thought, but it was full of him. “I’ve spent the last nearly fourteen years confronting, digging into, and then—mostly—throwing out the worst of the things I was raised to believe. That’s taken up quite a bit of my time and effort. Between that, my sisters, and my job, someone like you expressing an interest in me would have overloaded all my circuits. Okay, scratch that, you specifically. Now?”

His expression had started intent, a little sweet, but by the end, his eyes had gone slumbrous, and one corner of his mouth canted up. Sexy AF. That’s what he was.

Being with him in that moment wasn’t scary. It was joyous and full of potential. It was time to open herself up to the possibility of a relationship with someone other than Hamish. Fate had put her and Xander in one another’s path. Pippa liked him. Xander was compelling, and she wouldn’t turn that away. She wasn’t a coward.

“And now?” he prompted.

“Now, I’m still probably not ready for you,” she admitted with a laugh. “But I want to be.”

He hummed, and his fingertips were back to trace the curve of her cheek.

“I’m not sure I’m ready for you either,” he said quietly.

She was entirely certain that had to be false. Who was she that he had to be ready for her? She was a regular-smegular person. Everything about him was unique and accomplished.

“I have every certainty you’ll succeed,” she said, and then realized how much innuendo she put into it. Giddiness rushed through her like bubbles in champagne.

He smiled. “How do you know I’m pierced?”

An unexpected question. “I can see your ears and your nose. And I…well I looked at the magazine spread. Congratulations, again. Some of the photos of you were shirtless. I’m not…congratulating you on your shirtless body, though, I mean. You should be proud. So, I…the nipples I meant.” Her face was on fire, so she knew she blushed like mad.

“Ah.”

“Are there piercings I can’t see?” She nearly clapped her hand over her mouth but then decided not to be embarrassed at all.

“Do you want to see them?” he asked, his voice going lower.

Them? A flash of heat licked through her.

“Probably,” she said.

He grinned, a flash in the dark between them in the front seat of his car. “Do you have any piercings?”

“Nowhere exciting.” Her voice went up an octave.

“Everywhere on you is exciting,” he said as he traced around the outer shell of her ear with his pinky.

“Why?” The question was out before she could call it back.

He cocked his head. “Why is everywhere on you exciting?”

Pippa licked her lips. “Why do you think so?”

“The first time I saw you, it was your eyes. The way you took everything in greedily. You were so open and friendly. You have this curl right here.” He tugged it. “And it kept working itself free of the barrette. As if it declared itself independent of its brethren. I haven’t gotten it out of my head since. I haven’t gotten you out of my head since. Something about you calls to me. Speaks my language in a way that lures me away from the rock I like to hide under.”

Envy and admiration filled her at equal turns that he could be so free to say such things.

“And that’s exciting?” Surely his world was far more interesting than anything Pippa got up to.

“Very,” he said, and then his lips were on hers. Gentle at first as he waited, listening to her reaction. Pippa knew to her toes if she’d indicated discomfort in any way he’d have backed right off.

Consent was so sexy. Especially from someone who could simply take what he wanted.

She ran her palm against the warm, taut skin of his neck and up into his hair, pulling him closer. An invitation.

Pippa loved kissing. It was delightful, but low stakes usually. Fun without being too much or worrisome. Different people kissed in vastly different ways. Hard, soft, in between.

Xander’s kiss was a slow seduction. Little pecks. Nips of her bottom lip followed by a gentle suck. She leaned into his hold on a sigh, and his clever tongue swept into her mouth, sliding along hers. He tasted like the chocolate mint candy from the dish at the hostess stand.

She scored her nails along the back of his head, swallowing his growl in response.

The hand he’d had at her cheek tunneled through her hair. One of her barrettes flicked away, pinging off a seat, and it didn’t matter. The heat of his other palm singed her as he caressed up her side, over the outer curve of her breast, and then rested against her throat as he held her. Not confined. Cradled. With an edge.

Xander was very much in charge of what was happening. Not in a way that robbed her of her own will. But oh, she wanted to give over to it, to that control and power.

Outside the car, people walked past on the sidewalk just beyond the low wall around the parking lot. For a time, none of it intruded on their world and those kisses, but ten minutes later a car alarm sounded in the spot next to where they sat.

Xander wrenched himself back with a groan. “It’s Brody.”

Pippa tried not to gulp at the sight of Xander backlit by the white glow of the security lighting. His face was rendered in shadows, so it was hard to see his expression, but what flowed from him in waves was barely reined desire.

It was so much she drowned in it for long moments, enjoying it, even if she wondered if she was up to the task with a person like Xander. Hamish was hiding from himself, but the man across from her seemed to know exactly what he wanted, how he wanted it. Without hesitation.

“Don’t forget our place so we can get right back to it the next time we’re alone. Let me get your door,” he said, proving her unspoken thoughts true.

Pippa thought she said something like sure, but it came out like a wheeze. Which seemed only fair given how sexy he was.

“Hey, Brody.” Pippa waved after she got out.

Brody’s gaze went to Xander, and Pippa wasn’t certain, but she thought she caught a smile. “How was dinner? Elise and I had lunch there last week. I had the pesto with prawns. Now that I’ve just described it, I think I’m going to see if she wants to go tomorrow.”

Pippa laughed. She liked Brody Brown and the way he’d made some room in his family for her. At first it had been for no other reason than she was Rennie’s friend. But he and Elise had truly welcomed her, and as Pippa had gotten to know them better, she’d realized how lucky she was to have them in her life.

“It was excellent. I’m all carbed up and ready to change into pajama pants when I get home. My exciting life. I’ll be in bed by ten thirty after I do my skincare regimen.”

Xander bumped his hip against her playfully. “It’s working for you though. Sleep is important.”

Brody looked at his nephew again, this time with more scrutiny.

Finally, he tipped his chin. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Xander. Have a good night, Pippa. Rennie says you two are headed to some sort of arts festival this weekend?”

“Sunday up in Port Townsend. One of the guys I work with at Twisted Steel has a vacation house not too far from town, so we’ll spend Saturday night there and come back home after the festival on Sunday. Should be fun.”

“I’m sure you’ll all have a great time and be so safe no one’s dad will worry.”

Pippa laughed, truly liking Brody Brown. “We’ll do our very best.”

He got into his car and took off, leaving them alone again.

After unlocking her door, she tossed her bag into the truck. When she turned back to Xander, he was so close she ended up pressed against him. Not that she was complaining.

“Will you text me that you got home okay?”

No one other than her close friends and her sisters had ever asked such a thing. It made her fluttery inside.

“Okay. Thanks for dinner and the tattoo.”

He bent to kiss her again, quickly but thoroughly. When he straightened though, he paused, reaching out to touch her seat belt briefly. “Talk to you soon. Take care of your tattoo.”

Still, as she pulled her truck out of the lot and pointed herself toward home, her mouth tingled.