Chapter 18 Chapter 18

Together, curled up on the couch, all five of us watch one of the many horror movies brought by Taylor. Hush, is the first of many, and I don't find it frightening at all, but I still enjoy it. The main character gives me some confidence. If she can survive that with her struggles, then I sure as hell can conquer mine. 

Throughout the movie I find myself glancing over at Daniel, who happens to be sat at the opposite end of the couch. Is he trying to avoid me? Did he finally find out what everyone is whispering about? He sat up front, I was in the way back, I sit on one end of the couch, he sits on the other. Maybe I am thinking too far into it. Maybe he is trying to avoid me. Maybe—

"Hailey?" Jana pulls me back to reality and my eyes fall upon the rolling credits. "Taylor and Jordan are going on a walk, Daniel is going to bed, so what do you want to do?"

I can hear it in her voice, she wants me to mention the hot tub. "What if Jordan and Taylor—"

"They won't. I'm leaving the front door unlocked for them so they won't see you in the back."

"What if they want to come out and join us when they get back?" I question.

She smiles. "Oh, trust me, they'll be doing something else."

My face scrunched up and I get up from the couch, my mind conjuring terrible images of it. "God, Jana. How the heck do you know—"

"Taylor talked to me about it," she shrugs. "Just girl-talk."

Girl-talk. I don't remember it being so sexual, then again the last time I really had honest girl-talk was before the incident. I suppose it comes with age. Does Jana want to talk about these things with me? She knows she can't, she won't want to upset me. What other friendship things am I withholding?

"So?" She asks, hopeful.

My fists ball up, urging me to do it. I need Jana's friendship. "Okay," I breathe out, already regretting it.  "You have the one piece?"

Standing in the bathroom, staring into the mirror, I yank the suit on and take deep breaths. This will be good for me, conquering my fear, even if it feels like someone's hands are wrapped around my neck. Jana is waiting for me in the hall, so I pick up the beach towel and cover myself as if I have just gotten out of the shower. She smiles at the sight of me.

My eyes wander down the hall to the master bedroom doors, both closed with a dim strip of light at the bottom. I wonder what he is doing.

"Come on, I got everything ready." Jana leads me to the hot tub which is on a large porch in the backyard area. Outside, the moon is hidden behind the house and there are many more stars to view. The trees seem to blend together, giving our surroundings a creepy look, making me think back to the movie. "Do you want me to turn around?"

I look back to Jana, then to the beach towel around me. "I don't know. It's fine. You don't have to."

She nods and simply climbs into the bubbling water. I smile and take a moment to hype myself up.

It's just Jana. She's your friend, she won't hurt you. Be a normal teenager and gossip in the hot tub with your friend.

My fingers grip the towel. "Okay. It's coming off."

"It's coming off," she encourages me.

"It's just a swimsuit, and it's just you," I convince myself.

"It's just me. Conquer, Hailey. Take your life back," she cheers, making my heart race.

I count in my head, one, two, three, and before I know it, the towel is pooled at my feet and Jana is happier than ever. She splashes her hands in the water and I laugh as she cheers me on as I get in. The first thing I feel is the warmth, then the bubbles, then the sensation of water overall. I submerge myself in the missed feelings, a desert finally seeing rainfall.

"Amazing, right?" Jana sighs and sinks further down.

"Yeah, amazing," I murmur. "Thanks for this, for helping me I mean."

"Isn't that what friends are for?"

I roll my eyes at her cliché comment. "I suppose so."

"It feels nice to not be at school, to get away from certain people. Tyler got a girlfriend. He brought her flowers on her birthday and gave her this wrapped up box with a bow on it. She could hardly hold it, it was so big."

"Forget him," I reach out to her, continuing with the cliché phrases, "there's someone out there for you. He's not that great anyways."

She smiles. "Thanks. But you don't even know him."

"I don't have to. If he's dumb enough to choose another girl over you, then he's not that great in my book. Besides, it's best to wait until college to get a boyfriend, they're much more mature, at least that's what the girls whine about in the locker room."

Jana nudges me. "You actually listen to those conversations?"

"Well, it's not like anyone talks to me."

There's a moment of silence, and I know she's thinking about something. The air around us is cold, but the water keeps me warm. It will be hard to get out when we're done. I turn back to my friend and begin to say something casual, but she cuts me off. "How can they follow him around like that?"

"Who? Harrison?"

"Yeah. I mean, he's just a guy? Who cares if he's better looking?"

I shrug. "Well, he does have a lot of money, his Dad is the mayor, his mom has started many businesses around town and helps people with theirs. They donate a lot of money to charity and invest in local companies. Since they took over, Coldgrove has been doing great."

Jana crosses her arms. "So it's because of his parents?"

"Well, he is a golden boy. Great grades, great at sports, great looks, super charismatic, and no one knows that he's a monster on the inside," I explain, taking most of these facts from the locker room, "so what is there to hate about him? Girls want to be with him, guys want to be him, parents adore him, and the town sees his family as their saviors."

"It's bullshit," she mutters. "How will karma get to him if he's protected by a wall of money and praise? I just—I want to—ugh! If I had a baseball bat and if he was standing right here I would—"

"I get it. I just have to trust that he'll get what's comin' to him."

Jana sinks down further into the water, and something tells me that she has a plan of her own.