Chapter 23 (Clare)

In its place now an impenetrable thick cloud of obsidian darkness. She wouldn't allow another parent to leave her tattered, not when she had already so little to offer those who deserved it, who deserved her love, no matter how little of it she had to offer. It was the one thing she’d do for her mother, she would love those deserving of her love unconditionally. She refused to waste a fraction of it for this man who held her now when she was an adult and her heart already hardened by the ages. It was far too late.

He held her tight, swaying her body like a ragged doll in the middle of the forest. Realizing the wetness on her cheek was his and his intent was not to comfort her, but to reassure himself, her legs caved. Nobody had ever cried for her, cried for the person she was, but this man did. She expected to hit the ground but he didn’t let her fall, no, he held her up, and gave her the support she needed. They stood holding each other, like a long-awaited reunion, like two people who had experienced great loss, but where one was strong, the other one was just learning to walk.

There was no comfort in his arms, and as if he sensed so, he stiffened. Without a sound, she dropped her hands, and took a few steps back, picked up the packets she had discarded on the sandy ground beside her, and stood there, with a determined look, “You got your hug, my daughter duty is done, now it's your turn, I need some solid information, what am I?, or who am I?, at least tell my why the hell was those Tempters after me?”

She glared at him, stubbornness penetrated through her eyes letting him see the brick he was dealing with, “Dude you gotta give me something.”

In his attempt to try and keep his calm, which Clare was making disturbingly hard, Caidrian said softly, “You are going to get yourself killed, there’s a time and place to tell you all that you need to know, and now is neither.”

She pouted her lips which was a habit, and arched her brow before she dropped herself to the floor sitting on her butt. If he wanted to play tough ball then so be it.

“Suit yourself, I’m just going to sit here and wait for the demons and Tempters to arrive, maybe they’ll be more cooperative. I really have nothing to lose.”

She stared at Caidrian, waiting for him to reply her, but a sudden pain pocked inside her stomach, it was something she’d never felt before, her stomach contracted and with it a deep agonizing pain. Fisting both hands to apply pressure she howled in agony, “Aaah, shit, aaahhh, it hurts,” the pain similar to a severe case of food poisoning.

Caidrian knelt down beside Clare as she held her hands around her stomach rocking back and forth with her knees to her chest. Just a few hours ago she was with her mother, the woman who had not one nurturing bone in her body, the only parent she ever knew. The same person who carried her down Hyde-park when she hurt her knee and stitched it up. Her mother would’ve known what to do, she was a healer, a cold one, but a good healer. Clare wanted to scream for her, but there was no use, she wasn’t coming back.

Now in a matter of hours, Clare was motherless, orphaned, by the ultimate sacrifice a parent can make. It was then she recalled the last words her mother said to Barbatos before he ripped the life out of her, “better my life than hers.”

At first, she didn’t remember but now she did, what did it mean. Even with the pain and her constant rocking motions, it didn’t stop the questions.

Caidrian lifted her up by her shoulders and looked deeply into her eyes, “You're my daughter, no death or loss is going to change that, and I know you have questions, but the pain you’re feeling is only going to get worse, it’s a reminder that times passing, you need to walk, if you’re not safe, your mother would’ve died in vain. We have to bury her and draw out her power, her wishes fulfilled.” He let her go and with a firm voice “Now get up, the Caster is waiting at the entrance.”

Clare got up staggering quietly without a sound besides her footsteps pounding on the ground as she walked. Listening to the forest birds, the only sort of comfort she had, as the pain in her stomach lurked through her abdomen, like a curse, reminding her of the loss.

Caidrian broke the silence, “You really want to know who you are, I’m not sure you’ll be able to handle it, you lived as a deceptor for a long time.” She didn’t miss the curiosity in his voice, as they walked.

The path deepened further into the forest, leading to a higher spiralled walkway with sanded spots, it looked as though the entry had been blocked, deserted, and retained to its natural habitat with sky-high trees, and colorful birds.

Clare looked up at the trees, noticing the fading sun, darkness would soon follow. She thought about checking the time on her phone but remembered she lost it at the apartment. They started to close in toward the trees and branches which blocked their way, but the closer they moved, something extraordinary happened- the trees moved out of the way, bending. Clare gulped as she jerked back in wonder of horror. “CAIDRIAN.”

He laughed, “Relax, they’re giving us way. How else are we supposed to keep the deceptors out of the way.” She relaxed a little, but still weary with each passing step she took and each bend the trees made, it was way too much for her eyes to handle, especially after all that had already happened, but it was an incredible site for her sight

Caidrian muttered, “Never ceases to amaze,”

She said softly, “I wanna know everything.”