Chapter 3: A History Tutor

I eat breakfast in my dorm room at my desk. My desk lamp glows dimly in the background as Evie sleeps. My syllabus is covered in notes along with a notebook filled with interview-style of questions for my college professor. Evie believes I should wear a sexy red dress. That's a bit too flashy. I wear tight blue jeans and a v-neck t-shirt. I don't wear make-up and straighten my hair.

God this girly shit is a chore.

"Good luck, Cora," Evie smiles and waves from her bed. I'm jealous she gets to sleep in every morning until ten. All her classes start at eleven. Mine all start at eight or nine, but I do get my afternoons free.

I walk toward Professor Oakley's office. I try to treat it like a professional would. But truth be told my nerves are everywhere. He's only an adjunct professor, but he still gets his own office. I knock on the door and swallow.

"Good morning, Cora. Have a seat. What can I help you with this morning?"

I hand him my notes. I've forgotten everything I wanted to say.

"You don't have to be nervous around me. I know college can be intimidating. But that's what professors are here for. To help, guide, and mold minds."

"I'm sorry. I'm not used to asking for help. It's just so embarrassing. And I feel so stupid. In high school, I knew all the answers and now I'm completely lost."

I stop myself before I start rambling. I can be a bit much when I let my mouth run.

"That's fine. Have a seat. Help yourself to my Keurig. I have all kinds of flavors. Close the door and let's get started."

Professor Oakley takes a sip of his coffee and finally looks at me as I help myself to the Keurig.

"I'm sorry Professor Oakley. I've never used one before. I only know how to use a French press."

"It's alright. Just sit down and I can get it for you."

He closes the door and gets my coffee. When our eyes meet he looks startled. He seems to take notice of my hair. He doesn't say anything and I look down at my notebook as though I am here to learn.

"I'm sorry. Did I do something wrong, Professor Oakley? I'm already so embarrassed that I bumped into you the other day."

"Oh, that was you. You look so different now without your glasses and blonde hair. You look good. That didn't come out the way I meant it to. I'm sorry. I mean I like the change. And I'm glad you bumped into me. It made my first day a little bit brighter."

I put my hair behind my ear and try to pretend my professor didn't make comments about me.

"Professor, I'm sorry I shouldn't be here. I think I'll figure out this project on my own. Sorry to waste your time."

"Wait don't go. I'm sorry...I wasn't trying to hit on you. Can we start over? I really do want to help you better understand this paper."

My hand is already on the doorknob. But I decide to give him another chance. I didn't think he even remembered our meeting the other day. But the fact that our accidental bumping made an impression and that he noticed, scares the shit out of me.

"Yes, alright. Sure. What can you tell me about Chinese foot binding? Why did they do that to women? I don't understand how this ties into the assignment," I say to get things started.

For the next hour, Professor Oakley talks about Chinese history without looking at his phone or reading a book. He just knows it all the way a nerd would go on about Star Wars.

"Thanks for your help. I'm glad you could explain it to me. Would it be okay if I text you later?"

I put my hands on my mouth. That wasn't supposed to slip out, but it did. Professor Oakley doesn't say anything, but we both know we've said unprofessional things to each other. This meeting was no accident and neither of us will ever admit that our meeting and bumping into each other was our version of a meet-cute.

"I don't think you should be asking me that, Cora. I'm your professor and you're my student. If it's about homework that's one thing. But anything other than that is frowned upon. I'm very lucky to have a job here at this university."

"It's okay. I understand. And I didn't mean how it sounded. Of course, you are my professor. I meant can I text you later about the paper or email you the first few pages to see if I am on the right track?"

His brown eyes find mine, and my cheeks turn red as I collect my things. Professor Oakley smiles and a little laugh comes out.

"Oh, sure that's fine. It's nice to know you're not like your same-aged peers."

"What do you mean?"

"Well between you and me, it's hard to be a young professor. All these young ladies staring at me. They don't take me seriously. But I can see you do. So thanks for taking my class seriously. At least one young lady does."

"Oh, I didn't realize that Professor Oakley. I'm here to study. I don't pay attention to that sort of thing. As for your class, I am enjoying it. I am nervous to study Roman history. I always get Greek and Roman history confused. The ancient Egyptians are my favorite subject. I used to dress up as Cleopatra every year. I know she wasn't actually Egyptian. She was Greek I think."

My excitement is embarrassing. Truth be told I love history, well the creepy histories of the world anyway like the Salem Witch Trials and Vlad the Impaler.

"You know your history. And I can help you when we learn about Rome. Perhaps we can meet once a week before class to check in and see if you are understanding the material?"

I look down a little embarrassed.

"Is something wrong with a tutoring session?" Professor Oakley asks.

"I'm sorry Professor. I can't afford that. I don't have a way to pay you for tutoring. But that is very generous of you."

Professor Oakley grabs my shoulder and holds it firmly. His brief touch startles me and leaves a desire within me.

"I'm offering this to you, Cora. I'm not expecting you to pay for anything. Let's discuss it at a time that works for both of us and you can meet me here in my office."

I smile and agree. Professor Oakley opens the door and hands me my notebook. I'm not sure how I am supposed to pay attention to history class after spending an hour with him in his office. I take notes and go to my dorm room. Luckily Evie is in class and I can nap before she gets back. Never in my life did I think a professor would notice me, the way I've noticed him. And never did I think I would get tutoring sessions when I didn't even ask for them. All the other women in the class are sure to find out and will hate me for it.