Chapter 5

Pulse racing, Reed studied the other man, like he always did when facing an opponent. This time was different, though. Fighting Sin would be damn intense, but Reed was pretty confident he could take the man down, even if it took a few dirty tricks.

The problem was, he didn’t know if he wanted to win.

After getting his tattoo, Reed couldn’t stop thinking about the sensations. About Sin casually talking about the hardcore scenes he did in the dungeon. If Reed lost this fight, no one would question him playing that way.

Think it wasn’t really like him.

That it was too dark and twisted and he was supposed to shine.

Always.

The first hit Reed barely bothered to block. His returning punch had Sin’s eyes narrowing slightly before the man hit him again. A solid clip to the jaw. A warning that Sin wouldn’t take it easy on him.

Fuck, I hope not.

Challenge in his eyes, Reed danced out of reach. Caught Sin in the side with a light jab. How much rougher would he be if he was really mad? That would be something to see. To feel. Reed’s lips curved. The next uppercut had his vision spotting before he gave his head a hard shake.

“Don’t mess with me, boy.” Sin’s voice was low. “I’m not in the ring to put on a show.”

Reed wiped under his lip with his wrist. “Well, that’s no fun. We’ve got the audience for it.”

Shaking his head, unamused, Sin backed Reed up into the ropes with several sharp jabs Reed either had to evade or suffer for in a way that wouldn’t be fun at all. He ducked under Sin’s arm, jabbing his elbow into the man’s side before skipping out of reach.

The crowd loved it, but he wasn’t doing this for them. The rush came from knowing he could finally get to that level he thought he’d found once. That he’d earned right here.

Kinda fitting he’d get back there in the exact same place. On the canvas where he was fucking good at deciding the outcome. And a loss didn’t need to really feel like one at all.

A sudden restless anger in the crowd caught Reed’s attention a split second before Reed landed on his ass. Coming between him and Sin, Curtis executed a roundhouse, followed by several solid punches, only connecting with Sin’s jaw because of the man’s momentary shock.

“Curtis!” Lawson jerked Curtis back, then spun the other Dom around. Pressing him against the ropes, Lawson caught a blind punch before his hand framed Curtis’s jaw. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

Breaths blowing, nostrils flared, Curtis surged forward.

Lawson slapped him. Hard. The crowd went quiet. This time, Lawson’s voice was low and hard. “Pull it together. Now.”

Head to the side, Curtis stilled, the fight going out of him.

“Jesus Christ.” Reed pushed to his feet, spitting blood to the canvas while the ref checked on Sin. No way would the fight continue now. He glared at his Doms, throwing his hands up in the air. “I forfeit. That better? I asked if I could fight and you both said I could.” He strode to the edge of the ring, vaulting over and landing hard on both feet. Usually, he could do that without making a sound, nice and light, but looked like this was the only impact he was going to have. “I’m gonna go warn Matt not to take on any challenges. No reason to waste everyone’s time twice.”

“It’s a waste of time with you because everyone knows now you’re going to forfeit one way or another.” Curtis’s voice, for all its quietness, held a bitter edge as he lifted his head, his lip swelling. “Why didn’t you just tell me you wanted to fuck him?”

Face burning, Reed glared at Curtis. Fisted his hands at his sides as he lifted his chin. “If that’s all I wanted, I would’ve. Probably safer you storm in here, though. You lose your damn mind in the dungeon and someone’s gonna get hurt.” He snapped his hand into the gym door to open it and cut into the bar. “And not in a good way.”

With most of the members in the gym, the bar was pretty empty except for staff and a few subs who weren’t into fights. Everyone glanced over as Reed burst in, even Danny who was on the floor, and dropped a red ball to bark at him before snatching it up again and shoving it against Wren’s chest.

Jared stood, stepping in front of Reed. Laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Let’s talk.”

Shaking with anger, confusion, eyes stinging as he struggled to force both back, Reed pointed toward the gym door. “Everyone said to talk. I tried talking! And look where it got me!”

“Come here, my boy.” Arms around Reed, Jared held him for a moment, the scent of cigars and Scotch a familiar comfort. “I’ve got you.”

A swallow, then Reed let himself relax a bit, leaning into Jared’s hug, fucking needing it. Either that or punch something. He let out a shaky laugh, wiping a hand irritably under his eyes. “You doing this so you don’t end up having to set my hand again?”

Jared spoke his “Fringe benefit” into Reed’s hair, then pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

“Should I get him a drink, sir?” Wren rose smoothly, Danny’s leash wrapped around his hand. “Matt needs this break before the rush, but I can put together something disgustingly sweet I’m sure Reed will like?”

Matt spoke from close by. “I soaked an entire bag of gummy bears in cotton candy vodka for you. They’ve been in the fridge since last night.”

Laughing again, Reed turned a bit, his head still against Jared’s shoulder, meeting Matt’s eyes. “You’re the freakin’ best. I’d love that. And a drink. Just some Goldschläger, Wren. I’m not looking for a sugar coma.”

Blue eyes framed with gold-tipped lashes searched Reed’s own before Matt leaned in to kiss him softly. He pulled away, giving Reed a sad smile. “If I’da been in there, I’d have kicked some ass with you.”

“None of that, Matthew.” Jared nudged his chin toward the bar. “Get the candy and come sit with us in the sub’s corner.”

On the way to the comfy spot the subs had somehow claimed in the bar, Reed had to slow to avoid stepping on Danny’s leather paws. His throat tightened a bit when the pup rose to offer his ball. He brushed his hand over Danny’s hair, taking the ball and rolling it for him carefully toward the el of the bar so the other sub wouldn’t end up underfoot as members began to trickle in from the gym.

As Reed sat, Wren placed two glasses on the low table in front of the leather sofa. One with his drink, and a bourbon for Jared, who sat in the leather chair across from the heavy wood coffee table. Giving Reed a sympathetic look, Wren crossed the bar to get a hold of Danny’s leash again.

The other members in the bar gave Reed much less pleasant looks.

“God, people are going to be complete dicks about this.” Reed downed the contents of his drink in a few quick gulps. “I still had credibility, even though people know I cheat and throw some fights. Now? That’s gone. For good.”

Matt plunked down next to Reed. “I do stuff all the time and people don’t hold it against me. Not even Noah.” Shrugging, Matt turned to face him. “It’s a crazy place, but it works and nobody wants you to be anyone but you.”

Brow lifted, Reed stared at his best friend for a few beats. Then he nudged his chin toward the gym. “Did you miss what happened in there? No one wants me to be me. Not really. Not unless it’s easy and comfortable. And...I’ve tried to make sure it always is, but…” He held his empty glass between his hands, then reached for one of Matt’s magic gummies, biting it in half. “I needed this. I tried to do everything right. I don’t understand.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” Matt shook his head, glancing at Jared then back to Reed. “We only saw Curtis leave. I thought he was going to watch, even though he’d said he wasn’t going to. Shea was baiting him about you throwing the fight and Sin’s hands being all over you once already, so I guess I should’ve guessed it wouldn’t go good for you?”

Wonderful. Now Shea and Curtis’s bullshit was fucking with things too. Blowing out a breath, Reed set down the glass, then rubbed both hands over his face. “He broke up the fight and wailed on Sin. Lawson had to grab him and snap him out of it. The entire crowd knew what was gonna happen the second he walked in, but I didn’t see him until the last minute.”

Glass raised halfway to his mouth, Jared stilled. “He hit another member in the ring without a challenge, and…” Light blue eyes shuttered, Jared’s face going carefully blank. “I’m sorry, Reed. I should have stopped him. It won’t happen again during your rematch.” Glancing at the bar clock, Jared nodded slowly. “In a half hour.”

Wait...what? Reed blinked. “It wouldn’t be fair to fight Sin after that. He took hits that weren’t from me. And the members will be pissed about strings being pulled for the core.”

Jared leaned forward in a way that had Matt leaning back. Giving Reed a level look, Jared raised both brows. “Do I look like I give a fuck?”