07

“Again, I ask that you reconsider, Mrs. Maxfield,” Gilles quietly said. “You might think you’re looking for reasons to trust him but we both know you’re looking for reasons not to.”

I bit my lip as I leaned forward to watch Brandon’s car. “Don’t they mean the same thing in the end ?”

“They do,” he answered bluntly. “Either way, it means you already don’t trust him.”

I glowered at Gilles despite the pang of guilt I felt at his statement. “You know, it was so much more convenient when you weren’t saying much.”

Gilles gave me a half-smile. “Since I’m the only one here with you, I feel compelled to point out what you already know but you’re stubbornly ignoring.”

I sighed and rolled my eyes. “Insolence is what I get for being so nice to my staff.”

The chauffeur’s smile deepened this time. “No. Concern is what you get for being so nice to your staff. None of them want to see you get hurt.”

Even reluctantly, I felt myself smile when a movement from Brandon’s car caught my attention.

My heart resumed its nervous, ragged beating as I watched Brandon emerge from his car and pull something out—a huge plush panda.

He was just rounding his car when the front door of the townhouse opened and a woman stepped out, holding her arms out to him.

Tears stung my eyes but I blinked them stubbornly away, refusing to miss any bit of the truth that was being revealed before my very eyes.

Nicole.

She was a small woman, maybe only a couple of inches taller than me, but she had a daintiness about her—from the fine, shoulder-length brown hair pulled back by a white headband to the pale green sheath dress she was wearing. She was actually quite beautiful, her smile broad and sunny as she came down the steps to greet Brandon in a tight hug. Brandon’s back was to us so I couldn’t tell whether he was simply pressing his face next to hers as one would in a normal hug or he was giving her hickeys. They were embracing long enough that it was possible.

My breaths were coming out sharp and choppy as I continued to helplessly watch the train wreck in slow motion.

Brandon wrapped his free arm around her with genuine affection, his face lighting up with a smile as he stepped back to look at her.

They both looked up from their excited conversation when a blur of motion came through the front door and materialized in the small form of a boy who latched himself to Nicole’s leg as he looked up earnestly at Brandon.

Tears trickled down my cheeks as I watched my husband bend down and touch the boy’s head, grinning at him indulgently.

Of course you knew he was going to be a good father. If only you knew as well that he was already one.

He was telling Zach something that made the boy’s face brighten up and loosen his hold on his mother’s leg.

Brandon handed him the panda, which looked almost bigger than Zach, and waited as the boy stared at it with a mouth rounded in curious delight. Brandon laughed when the boy put his arms around the toy for a quick hug. He suddenly turned to Brandon and awkwardly put his free arm around him in a similar hug before he staggered up the steps with fierce determination to manage carrying the panda on his own.

Pain seared through me as Brandon and Nicole shared an amused glance before Brandon laughed and scooped up Zach with one arm and walked him up the steps with Nicole at his side.

In a matter of seconds, they were gone from my sight.

The pain though—the slow, steady stabs through my heart until it was bleeding everywhere—stayed with me.

“I want to leave now,” I said hoarsely as I sagged back into my seat. “Now, please.”

I took deep, long breaths to calm myself and hold it together but my hands started trembling as I tried to literally rub the pain away from my tightening chest.

“Charlotte ?” Gilles asked warily as he turned the engine on.

Now he was using my first name ? Nothing like witnessing someone’s pain and humiliation to get personal.

I lifted my eyes to meet his and through the film of tears in my vision, I saw him wince.

“I don’t need your damned pity,” I choked out just as sobs started to rack my shoulders. I pounded on my chest with a clenched fist, trying to stop them but I only felt more suffocated. “Just get me out of here !”

We flew out of there but after only a few minutes, the car stopped.

Through my gasping sobs, I looked up as the door swung open and Gilles poked his head in.

“Get out,” he said.

If there was a good time for my bulldog of a chauffeur/bodyguard to leave me alone as he usually did, it would be now.

“What do you want ?” I snapped, grabbing my hair. “Just do your job, goddammit, and get me home !”

Home ? Do you mean the penthouse where you’re living out your farce of a marriage ?

“Oh, God,” I moaned as fresh tears coursed down my cheeks. “I don’t even have a real home anymore, do I ?”

“Get out, Charlotte,” Gilles repeated stubbornly.

I glared at him. “I swear, Gilles, I’m going to kick your—”

I yelped as he grabbed my wrist and unceremoniously dragged me out of the car. I stumbled onto a patch of grass and nearly fell if he hadn’t caught me by the elbow.

“Now, shout until you get it all out,” he ordered, standing back. “Or go hit something. Get it out before it eats you alive.”

My sobs came to an abrupt halt as I blinked several times and saw that we were in a piece of scrubland somewhere in an industrial area. The weeds were tall and the alleys around it were devoid of people.

« Shout, » Gilles prompted.

I straightened and gave him a wary look. « People will think you’re murdering me if they hear me screaming. »

That didn’t perturb him as he shrugged. « Then make it quick before anyone can hear you and come running. »

I sniffed, dragging the back of my hand across my wet cheeks. « You’re not doing a good job of copying this from the movies, you know ? This doesn’t feel as dramatic as I’d imagined. »

« I never claimed to have a dramatic bone in my body, » he answered, leaning against the car and crossing his arms. « But if this stops you from having a panic attack, then do it. »

My heart dropped back down into my stomach at the reminder as I walked forward a few steps and started kicking some small rocks around.

« I’m not going to shout, » I told him in barely a whisper. « I can breathe now. »

We were both quiet for a long while and I was alright with that.