Chapter 4

"I know he's a kid!" The words ripped out of me. "But that doesn't mean he gets to hurt people without consequence! If it had been a different wolf today—if he'd thrown that on a wolf with a real killer instinct—he'd be dead! Teaching a child to take responsibility for his actions—isn't that *exactly* what a pair of future Alphas should be doing?!"

They all went still.

"Or," I said with a bitter smile, "in your eyes, as long as it's me, any harm done is *deserved*?"

Sera stared at me, something complicated moving behind her expression. Then she turned to her son and crouched in front of him.

"Finn," she said gently, "Elara is right. What you did was wrong."

"But Mommy, she's a bad lady! She wanted to drive us away!" Finn cried.

"Even if she's done unkind things," Sera said, "that doesn't give you the right to hurt her unprovoked. Hurting someone without cause is something to be ashamed of. Now apologize."

Finn chewed his lip, tears brimming. But under Sera's unwavering gaze, he managed a small voice: "I'm… I'm sorry."

I looked at him—this five-year-old boy—and a bone-deep exhaustion washed over me.

"Forget it," I said.

Then I turned to Sera. "Thank you, but I don't need your healing. My regeneration is enough to handle this."

And it was true—I could already feel the wound knitting shut. Slowly, painfully, but my body was breaking down the silverleaf toxin.

"As for you two," I said, looking at Kael and Kieran, "I'll give you what you want. A strong, independent she-wolf worthy of the Luna title. It just won't be me."

I turned and started walking away.

"Elara, wait!" Kieran called after me.

"Don't follow me." I didn't look back. "This is my last request. Grant me a little dignity. Let me leave with some grace."

I quickened my pace until I was nearly running.

I needed to find my father. Now. Immediately.

I burst into his study while he was buried in paperwork. The sight of me stopped him cold, and he rose sharply.

"Elara! Your arm—"

"Father." I cut him off. "I'm going through with the alliance. I'm deciding now. Three days is too long—I won't wait another minute."

Marcus looked at me, pain flooding his eyes.

"Sweetheart…"

"Please, Father." I dropped to my knees before him. "Let me leave this place. I can't take any more."

He was silent for a long time. Then, at last, he nodded.

"All right. You have my word."

Over the next two days, a palpable unease settled over the pack.

The closer the vampire alliance drew, the thicker the tension grew. Everyone was whispering, speculating about which unfortunate she-wolf would be sent off to those cold-blooded creatures.

I locked myself in my room and went nowhere.

The wound on my arm was healing slowly, but it would leave a faint scar. For a werewolf, only silver weapons and certain rare toxins could scar us permanently—and silverleaf happened to be one of them.

That scar would remind me forever of how pathetically I had groveled to salvage something already shattered.

On the evening of the third day, a knock came at my door.

It was them.

Kael and Kieran stood outside, their faces grim.

"Elara, we need to talk," Kael said.

"There's nothing to talk about." I leaned against the doorframe. "What do you want to say? Talk me out of the alliance? Or warn me not to send Sera in my place?"

"We heard," Kieran said. "After that night, you went to your father, and the Elder Council never discussed another candidate."

"So?"

"Elara," Kael took a deep breath, "we know you hate us, but you can't use this as revenge. Sending Sera to the alliance—that's—"

I laughed.

I actually laughed.

Laughed until tears streamed down my face.

"You really think," I wiped the corner of my eye, "I'd send *her*?"

They froze.

"You really think I still care about her?" I went on. "Kael. Kieran. You give yourselves far too much credit. Yes, I used to hate her. I hated that she stole your attention, hated that she was so flawless she made me look like nothing. But now…"

I shook my head. "Now I just want to leave. Leave this place soaked in painful memories. Leave you."

"What do you mean?" Kieran's voice tightened.

"I mean," I lifted my chin and met their eyes, "the name on the alliance roster is mine. Elara Nightshade. Daughter of Alpha Marcus. I will go marry that vampire lord, and I will leave this place and never come back."

"You've lost your mind!" Kael snarled. "That's a death sentence!"

"Maybe." I shrugged. "But it's my choice. And you have no right to stop me. You gave me up, remember? You broke the mate bonds. You chose another she-wolf."

"Elara—"

"Get out." My voice was perfectly calm. "Get out of my sight. Go be with your precious Sera. Go become your great dual Alphas. Go find a Luna worthy of you. But that wolf will never be me."

I slammed the door shut, leaving them standing on the other side.

Through the gap beneath the door, I could hear their conversation.

"She's bluffing," Kael said. "She just wants to see us beg. The Alpha and the Elders will never approve it."

"You're right… she's too timid and fragile to actually go through with a vampire marriage…" Kieran's voice was faint.

Their footsteps faded away.

I slid down against the door and closed my eyes.

*Goodbye, Kael. Goodbye, Kieran.*

*Goodbye to the love I once believed would last forever.*

Two hours later, I climbed into a carriage bound for vampire territory.

My father walked me to the manor gates himself. His eyes were rimmed red, but he didn't cry. As Alpha, he couldn't show weakness in front of the pack.

"Remember," he whispered in my ear, "no matter what happens, you will always be a daughter of House Nightshade. If you ever want to come home, you come home."

"I will, Father," I said.

The carriage rolled away from the manor, and I looked ahead.

In that direction, deep within the distant vampire lands, a vampire lord named Lucian was waiting for me.

They said he was ruthless. Savage. That he never let any woman near him.

But so what?

Could a cold-blooded vampire possibly break my heart worse than two wolves who threw me away?

The carriage pressed on through the night, carrying me toward an unknown fate.

And I, Elara Nightshade, had finally learned to let go.