Love Me, Please
THREE YEARS had passed, but there was no improvement in their relationship. Instead, it became worse.
At first, Ezio thought that maybe, when they are already married, he can make Chiara love him. But he was so wrong on many way.
His plans to make her his and make love with her cannot be done. In their years of marriage, they never slept on the same room. Chiara chose to sleep in a guest room instead of sleeping in the master bedroom with him.
But Ezio is a persistent man. He will sleep with his beloved in any way possible, so he would sneak on her bedroom every night.
Just like today.
His fingers ran through her hair as he stare on her adorable sleeping face. His movements are very careful not to wake her up.
"You look so peaceful," he whispered under his breath.
The back of his hand caressed from her temple to her cheeks, down to her jaw and neck. Ezio was trying his best not to lean down and kiss her, even though he can.
"When will you sleep in my room? When will you sleep beside me?" he asked her even though she won't answer. "I don't like sneaking in your room every night, but I have to. It's the only way I can sleep with you."
He slowly moved his body to lay down beside her. Unconsciously, Chiara moved closer to him and snuggled on his chest.
It made Ezio smiled. It made his heart beat louder. Sometimes, he'd wondering if Chiara can hear his thumping heart.
"How I wish you'll also do this when you're awake," he spoke before kissing her hair. "Just a hug in the morning from you is enough to make my day. I'm just asking for a hug, cara."
Chiara babbled something that he can't understand. He just blew a soft but deep breath before closing his eyes to sleep.
Just as before the darkness consumed him, he heard Chiara sleep talking.
"Babe," she murmured while smiling.
It took just one word from her to slash a large wound in his heart. Even if asleep, she can still remember his ex-boyfriend.
It's been three years. Ezio wanted to question why she still haven't moved on from Simone, but he can't question it, knowing that he is also in love with her for several years and counting. He can't move one from Chiara even though they have no relationship in the first place.
"I wish you'll also call me like that. I wish you'll smile at me like that," he prayed while closing his eyes, but he knew better. His prayers won't happen anytime soon.
But as long as she's near him, it's enough. This will do for now.
Before the sunrays shine on the window, Ezio is already awake -ready to leave Chiara's room before she woke up.
He stayed hugging her for a couple of minutes before kissing her forehead and leaving the room hesitantly.
This is his daily routine. Wake up before Chiara's awake, go to work, go home, stay in his room and wait for Chiara to sleep, sneak in her room, sleep, and repeat it all over again.
He just hope that the day where he can finally sleep with her without sneaking will come true.
A man can hope.
***
It was an uneventful day for Chiara. Same things happen everyday since she got married.
At first, she thought that Ezio will force her to do wife duties. She was thankful that her thoughts were wrong.
Since the start of their marriage, he never forced her to sleep with him and give him his needs as a man. She can see that Ezio is trying to enter her heart. He will ask the cook to prepare her favorites. He will let her spend and max out his card without hesitation.
However, the downside is he easily get angry on other men she will put attention to, especially when it's about her ex-boyfriend. Every time they will argue about something, Ezio will always bring up that she is her parents' payment for their debts and that she must comply on everything he asked.
It was suffocating living with the man you hate. Even though Ezio has his own good traits, Chiara couldn't help but to notice the bad ones more. She always find herself comparing Ezio to Simone. From the way they speak, until to their characteristics and values.
She is just trying to survive living with him and act like a happy couple in front of others. And on the next week, she will do it again. In front of his business partners for the birthday party of one of his investors.
"Babe, I miss you," Chiara spoke while holding the picture frame that holds the photograph of her and Simone.
She caressed Simone's face on the photo. It was taken during their second anniversary. Of course, she couldn't forget it. Simone brought her to a cat restaurant. It was the happiest day of her life - the day where she petted a lot of cute cats.
"How are you? Have you already forgot about me?" she asked as tears started flowing from her eyes.
Memories of their love flashed on the back of her brain. In her mind, she was happily married with Simone. In her reverie, she was spending her days with him.
"I tried to forget about you, but I can't," her voice cracked while talking to his picture. "I love you so much."
She moved the picture near to her face and kissed it. Her hands moved to put the frame on her chest while reminiscing their moment.
She can hear him say "i love you". It echoes inside her head. She can even feel the warmth of his touch. She hear the softness of his voice. She can feel him near her.
She can't open her heart to anyone, not even to her own husband. In her mind, her heart always belongs to Simone. Her mind is locked up to love someone else.
Chiara was thinking of her happy moments with him when she heard a loud thump near her.
When she opened her teary eyes, she saw Ezio standing in front of her. His eyes are full of worry. She can't help but to remember Simone's worrying face and compare it to him.
"Cara," he called her. "Why are you crying? Does something hurt?"
Ezio moved closer and tried to touched her arms, but Chiara hurriedly moved backward and hid the picture frame behind her. Of course, it didn't escaped Ezio's eyes.
"What's that?" he asked. "What are you hiding?"
Chiara swallowed the lump on her throat. "It's nothing."
Ezio, who has an idea on what she was hiding, cannot hide the irritation in his voice. "I'll ask you again. What are you hiding?"
"I already answered you. It's nothing," she responded.
"If it's really nothing, then why are you hiding it from me?"
"I said, it's nothing!" Chiara shouted at him. "Just leave me alone!"
But Ezio didn't listen. He took steps forward and reach for the frame that she was hiding.
"Go away!" Chiara screamed while trying to escape Ezio's hands.
"I won't leave until you show me what you're hiding," he said. Ezio gripped one of her arms to stop it from moving and used his other hand to grab the frame away from her.
But the grip wasn't strong enough because he doesn't want to hurt her, so Chiara easily fought back and nudge his hands away.
"I told you that it's nothing! Why won't you listen to me?!" she exclaimed. Chiara ran towards the door while holding the frame.
However, just when she was about to step outside the room, Ezio was able to hit the frame with force.
The frame when flying on to the side. It hit the wooden table and it bounced back, landing on the floor near Ezio's feet.
He can see the photo clearly. He slowly picked it up and stare at it.
There he was. The man he was jealous to for several years. The man who owns his beloved heart.
"Why do you still have this?" he asked, trying calm himself down.
"I just want to store some memory of him," Chiara answered and tried to get the picture back, but Ezio extended her arms up.
She couldn't reach it. Her 5'3 height has no match to his 6'5 height. Even if she tried to jump, she still wouldn't be able to reach it.
"I told you to dump everything that reminds you of him. How hard is it to do that?" Ezio spoke while glaring at her.
Chiara put her hand down and let out an unbelievable chuckle. "You don't know how hard it is to do what you're asking."
"It's so simple, Chiara."
"Nothing is simple when it comes to Simone."
Ezio's ears rang. "I told you not to speak his name again. Forget about him, Chiara."
"I will never forget him. I can't forget him," she spoke as her voice cracked. "You're making me forget the person I love the most. You're making forget the most important part of my life."
"I am your husband, Chiara. I am supposed to be the most important part of your life," Ezio hissed and his grip on the frame tightened, making the glass of it shattered in to big pieces.
"You're just my husband on paper, but I'm not considering you as one. And I never will," Chiara answered and glared at him. "You may use all your power to own me, but you will never own my heart."
Ezio's patience just snapped. In swift moves, he threw the frame on the floor. The frame broke into smaller pieces
"What did you do?!" Chiara screamed and hurriedly tried to pick the photo.
However, Ezio was faster than her. He picked the photo up and took a couple of steps into the fireplace.
"Stop!" Chiara shouted and ran towards him when she saw him trying to burn the picture. "Don't do that! Please!"
"Do not beg, cara," Ezio spoke with no emotion.
He crumpled the paper in his right hand and threw it to the fire. The photo lit up and was consumed by the fire slowly.
"No! Simone!"
Chiara ran to the fireplace and tried to save the photo. She kneeled and tried to get the photo from the fire.
"Chiara!" Ezio exclaimed when he saw her putting her hands on the fire. "Stop that! You're hurting yourself!"
But she wouldn't listen. Even though Ezio was pulling her away, she kept on moving forward and reaching the photo.
She doesn't care if the fire will burn her hand. All she cares about is the photo of her and her ex-boyfriend.
When she finally got it after several attempts, Chiara hurriedly left the living room. She ran upstairs and locked herself in her room, just like what she always do.
"Simone... Simone," she spoke while opening the crumple photo.
When she finally opened it, she realized that a small part of her face - the chin -, her neck, and the left part of her body were already burned, but she doesn't care. What's important to her is that Simone is complete and fine in the photo.
Chiara hugged the photo of her ex-boyfriend until she fell asleep.
When Ezio sneak into her room that night, he saw her sitting on the floor while hugging the photo. He carefully carried her and lay her down on the bed.
He tried to remove the photo from her hands, but her grip so strong that she doesn't want to let it go. In the end, Ezio decided to just let it go.
He lay down beside her. "I can't understand why you love him so much," he spoke to her.
"I'm here, but why can't you love me cara? Do I need to be like Simone for you to love me back? Am I that hard to love?"
He waited for an answer, but of course, Chiara can't give him one.
"Love me, cara. Please, love me," he whispered in her ear before sleeping beside her.
Ezio will just cherish moments like this, because he knew that once the morning comes, he will need to leave her side again.