Chapter 4: Glad I Did

Lunch is a place of status and friends. I don't possess either of those things. My sacked lunch is in my bag, and I pull it out. As I open it, I see a handwritten note from my mother.

Lily-kins,

Don't forget to take the trash out when you get home.

Love,

Mom

I throw the entire lunch away. Mother's bus photo is enough to make me skip eating altogether. Screw eating a sacked lunch, I want real food and by real food I mean go to a restaurant.

I walk out of the school building unnoticed. No one seems to care that I've skipped school this morning. God only knows what I missed on the first day of Environmental Science and British Literature. Since I read all the Brit Lit novels over the summer, I doubt I am behind at all.

I walk back to the Harris Park tree. Jeremy Davis is still sitting there writing away in his journal.

"Hey, Jeremy. I'm ditching lunch. Want me to pick anything up for you from Sammy's Sub Cafe?"

Jeremy stops writing, and the dark hair covering his face earlier goes to the other side of his face. When both his light blue eyes find mine, he looks like a lost person whose soul is departed beneath the ground. When souls are lost, they speak to me. I can almost hear their silent torment.

"Sure. I'll take a turkey club and hold the mayo. I hate mayonnaise."

"I don't like it either. And you got it. Want a soda?" I ask.

"Sure, Dr. Pepper. Why are you being so nice to me," Jeremy asks?

"I figured you were hungry, and since everyone else in that school is a preying vulture, I had to leave."

I get out my phone and start typing Jeremy's order into my notepad app.

"I don't blame you for ditching. Your mother sounds like a real piece of work. I can't believe she thought posting a photo of her daughter online was a brilliant idea."

My face turns red. My back stiffens with anger. It's not anger towards Jeremy, who clearly has been on Instagram in the last thirty minutes. It's anger towards the woman who birthed me.

"I'm pissed at her, if you're wondering. You want to come to the restaurant with me?"

My goosebumps are raised and chilly to the flowing air around them. A hissy cat would be better company than a friendless loser like me.

"Nope. I'm not leaving this tree. If the principal finds me, I'm expelled for ditching. Of course, it's the first day, but still. I'm sure he found out about my summer."

I climb up the tree. Jeremy seems to be letting his guard down for a hot minute. I seize the moment and find myself sitting right next to him in that large comfortable middle section of the tree. It's large enough for the both of us to sit with our legs crossed.

"What the hell? When did you climb into the tree again?"

"You were talking about your summer shenanigans. Please continue."

I ignore his advances to push me out of the tree. He needs to get something off his chest, and since we are both friendless teens at the same school, our respect for each other has grown immensely.

"I try to be a good person. Or at least I tell myself that. But then I get bored, and nothing good ever comes out of my boredom. I played with fire, and let's just say the Vineyard Church fire on Second Street wasn't an accident. The fire got big and hot rather quickly."

"Wait, you did that? Did you burn the church to the ground? That was all over the news. You could get into trouble for that. Don't worry; I won't say anything. It's not my place to come clean. That's on you. You still want that sub sandwich?"

I change the subject to indicate that I'm not here to judge his past. We are two mutual strangers, with no other friends but one another in this crazy instance.

He looks at me and studies my face. His blue eyes gaze up at my hair and my outfit.

"You could be pretty, you know. Why do you have to look like that? And sure, a sub sandwich still sounds good to me."

"You expect me to feed you after an insult like that?" I bark.

"No, I don't. I'll pay for both of us. It's the least I can do for making you feel terrible. I didn't mean it that way. All I'm saying is if you dressed a little differently or wore some make-up, you'd be beautiful."

I want to blush, but boys are stupid. And his compliment sounds like a kindergarten student composed it.

"I'll never be pretty. Not with these train tracks hiding my smile."

"Is that the reason you don't try to look nice?"

The more Jeremy talks, the more I want to punch him for seeing the truth about me. He knows more about me than anyone at that school. He's figured out my whole life from a single conversation, and I find it both off-putting and slightly amazing.

"It's not the only reason. But yeah, I guess that's right."

Jeremy climbs down the tree, and the scratches on his arm make an appearance. They look like they're healing up. The scabs on the scratch marks look chapped and pink.

He catches my eyes, staring at his forearms and the cuts that are there. He covers them up with the sleeves of his hoodie. My eyes quickly find his, and the light bluish color has disappeared into a lighter grey. His eyes remind me of a cat, ever-changing and ever observant.

I wonder about all the things Jeremy has witnessed from the top of the big tree. It's his home away from home. What other conclusions has he come up with about the other people in our town? Did I even want to know, perhaps not?

"Don't let the KAT trio get to you. You're a lot smarter than they are."

"How did you know they are bullying me?" I ask.

I thought I was invisible to this school—a living ghost among the healthy student body. However, Jeremy notices quite a bit, or so it would seem.

"I read their comments on Instagram. And I can see and hear a lot from this big ass tree. So, let's go to that Sub Cafe. I'm starving."

Jeremy and I talk about everything. I didn't know an interesting soul existed within the walls of Ashmore Highschool. We've spoken so much; I almost consider him a friend. But, during our entire conversation, I don't mention the Lending Library or the notes I've been finding. For if I did, and it is him reaching out, it might scare him away. And I'm in no place to chase away my new and only friend. But, if the reason I found those notes was to become his friend, then I'm glad I did.